


Secrets

by supernatural_lover_1983



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Gen, Multi, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-11
Updated: 2020-11-03
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:49:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 33
Words: 30,167
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26957608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supernatural_lover_1983/pseuds/supernatural_lover_1983
Summary: Steve Rogers a successful businessman has an estranged wife(you) who disappeared from his life after months of marriage, unknown to him, he also has a son.
Relationships: Original Male Character/Reader, Sharon Carter/Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers/Original Female Character(s), Steve Rogers/Reader
Comments: 82
Kudos: 143





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> You loved Steve Rogers and married him for this love despite having an abusive past, he never confessed his love for you, not even when he proposed. You left him after realizing that he never loved you, he wanted to own you.

Steven Grant Rogers was running around, something he did whenever he got the free time. It was a beautiful spring morning, with clear blue skies and a gorgeous view encompassing thousands of acres of lush green earth and forest. But he was sad and had been since the breakdown of his marriage almost two and a half years earlier.  
He was a wealthy man, for a man strong, proud, and successful as Steve, his failed marriage was a bitter truth that undermined his every achievement.  
He had followed his heart and not his head and he had married the wrong woman, a very expensive mistake for which he was still paying the price.  
His younger brother, Rick, had taken a job in London, cutting off all contact with his mother and siblings. Yet if Rick, whom Steve helped raise after their father’s sudden death, came back....could he forgive the younger man and let him back into his family ?  
Steve swore under his breath as he contemplated that cruel question and the less than acceptable negative answer that he would have had to give it. However, when it came to you, there was no forgiveness in his heart, only outrage, and aggression. He nursed a far from a charitable desire for vengeance against you and the brother who had together betrayed his trust and his love. Ever since you had walked out on their marriage and disappeared, defying his wishes to the last, Steve wanted revenge.  
His smartphone chimed and, suppressing a groan of frustration, as it was always a struggle to find rare moments of peace, he pulled it out. His brows rose when he learned that the private eye he had hired to find you had come to see him. He rode swiftly back to the mansion, wondering impatiently if Jasper Sitwell had finally managed to track down his estranged wife.  
'I apologize for coming to see you without an appointment. But I knew you would want to hear the news as soon as possible. I found Y/N.’  
‘Where?’ Steve questioned and, he listened while Sitwell furnished further details about you.  
Then, unfortunately, at that point, his mother, entered the room. A difficult company, Donna settled ice blue eyes on the private eye and demanded to know if he had any news of you or your whereabouts. After a satisfying reassurance from Sitwell, a rare smile of approval lightened her expression.  
‘There is one more fact I should add,’ Sitwell revealed in a reluctant tone of voice, evading the uncomfortably intense scrutiny of his client’s mother.  
‘Y/N is a mother now, to a little boy of around two years of age.’  
Steve froze and a deafening silence greeted Sitwell’s startling announcement.  
The door opened again and Steve’s older sister, Rebecca, entered with a quiet apology to her brother for the interruption. She was hushed by her domineering mother, who said glacially, ‘That slut who married your unlucky brother has given birth to a boy’  
Shocked at such an announcement being made in front of Jasper Sitwell, Rebecca shot her brother a horrified glance. Steve wanted to yank Sitwell’s collar and force every single fact from the man. Sitwell sensed Steve's desperation and handed Steve a slim file and hastily excused himself.  
‘A…child?’ Rebecca gasped in shock and dismay as soon as the door had closed on the private eye’s departure.  
‘But whose child?’  
His profile set like granite, Steve answered his sister only with a dismissive shrug. It was certainly not his child, but for him, that had to be the biggest mark of humiliation he had ever suffered. Yet another metaphorical nail in the coffin, he accepted bitterly. , he had learned it the hard way, you knew exactly how best to put a man through an emotional and physical wringer.  
‘If you had listened to me,’ Donna lamented. ‘The second I met that woman I knew she was wrong for you. You were one of the most eligible bachelors in America and you could have married anyone but....’  
‘I married Y/N,’ Steve pointed out, Steve had never had much time for the older woman’s drama.  
‘Only because she trapped you in her spell, like the shameless bitch she is. One man was never going to be enough for her. Thanks to her, Rick is living on the other side of the world.’  
‘Enough!’ Steve shouted.  
‘There is no point in this now. What’s done is done.’  
Donna, her lined face full of anger and malice, rested accusing eyes on his lean strong visage.  
‘But it is not done yet. You still haven't started divorce proceedings.’  
I will visit that town and see to it as soon as the arrangements can be made,’ Steve replied.  
‘Send the family lawyer! There is no need for you to make a trip,’ his mother protested with vigor.  
‘There is every need,’ Steve contradicted. ‘Y/N is still my wife.’  
Donna broke into loud protests and Steve lost patience.  
‘I don’t want either your permission or your approval.’  
Steve retired to the privacy of his study and poured himself a scotch. A child? You had had a child. He was still in shock at that revelation, not least because he could hardly forget that you had miscarried his baby shortly before you had left him. That was how he knew beyond any shadow of a doubt that the child, which she had given birth to since then could not possibly be his. So, was the boy Rick’s baby? Or some other man’s? He hated the wild thoughts that slivered through his mind like a knife blade.  
He looked through the file but there were few facts. You were now living in a small town where you ran a florist’s shop. For a moment as he allowed himself to think about your memories threatened to overwhelm him, but he shut them out, with self-discipline was second nature to him. Where was that trait when he got involved with you in the first place?  
He could make no excuses for his behavior because he had freely acknowledged the huge and overwhelming differences between them even before he married you. Of course, what had mesmerized him then was your simplicity.  
Steve had been more vulnerable to the temptation than he had ever realized. Possibly life before that point had ruined him with too many easy women throwing themselves at him. His failure to keep a lid on his need to save you just for himself had proved to be his weakness. However, the time had passed and the process of disenchantment he had experienced during his short-lived marriage had obliterated the attraction factor.  
His ill-judged marriage had, after all, virtually destroyed his family. But in the short term, you had no family support of your own and you were still wife; regardless of his feelings, you remained his responsibility, as did your kid until the divorce was finalized.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

While you wrapped the bouquet in clear, decorative cellophane, Mattie peered round the corner of the shop counter, his innocent eyes dancing with mischief.  
‘Hello,’ he said animatedly to the waiting customer, shyness not being one of Mattie’s traits.   
‘Hello. He’s a beautiful child,’ the woman remarked, smiling down at Mattie as the toddler looked up at her with his uncontainable grin.   
It was a compliment that often came Mattie’s way, you agreed with a biased heart, your beautiful baby boy, as you slotted the payment in the cash register. Like father like son, you thought remorsefully, and in looks, Mattie was very much a product of his father’s genes, with blue eyes, sharp nose, and pointed chin. All he had inherited from you was your rampant curls.   
However, Mattie had all the warmth and your optimistic nature and rarely a hint of his father’s zealous character.   
With a slight shiver, you pushed that unnerving thought back out of your mind. With Mattie playing with his toy cars at your feet, you returned to making a flower arrangement requested by a client who had photographed a similar piece of floral art at an art show.   
A pure accident had brought you to this small town at a catastrophic point in your life and you had never regretted staying on and laying the foundations for your new future here.   
The only work you had been able to find locally while you had been pregnant was as an assistant at a flower shop. You needed to earn back your self-respect by keeping busy and positive. Discovering that you had a very real interest in designing and decorating, you had found more than a job to focus on and had since studied part-time for formal qualifications. By that time your employer decided to retire, because of his declining health, you had the courage and idea to take over the business and expand it by taking on occasional private projects that encompassed small weddings and other such functions.   
You were so proud of running your own business that sometimes you had to pinch yourself to believe that you could have come so far from your rough beginnings. Not bad for the daughter of a violent and criminal father who had never worked if he could help it, and a demoralized, alcoholic mother, who had died when her husband crashed a stolen car. You had never dared to develop any aspirations as a teenager. Nobody in your family had ever tried to climb the career or social ladders.   
‘Those kinds of ideas aren’t for the likes of us. Y/N needs to get a job to help out at home,’ her mother had told the teacher who’d tried to persuade the older woman that her daughter should stay on at school to study for her A-level exams.   
‘You’re like your mother, dumb as a rock and useless!’ your father had condemned often enough for that label to have troubled for many years afterward.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

After lunch, you walked Mattie down to his session at the playgroup in the small townhall, grimacing when your son bounded noisily through the door calling his friends’ names at the top of his lungs. Mattie, named after his great-grandfather on your mother’s side of the family, was very outgoing and full of energy after spending the morning cooped up at the shop with his mother. Although you had created a play corner in the back storeroom for your child, there wasn’t enough space to keep an energetic little boy for long. With the help of a babysitter, you were often forced to keep Mattie with you during your working hours, but now that he was of an age to join the playgroup in the afternoons and you no longer attended designing classes you needed a lot less childcare. Considering that her close friend and former babysitter, Maria, was now often too busy with her bed-and-breakfast to help out.  
It was a pleasant surprise therefore when Maria came into the shop an hour later and asked if you had time for a coffee. Brewing up in the small kitchen, you eyed your friend and read the other woman’s uneasiness with a frown.  
‘What’s up?’ you asked.  
‘It’s probably nothing. I meant to come over and tell you at the weekend, but a whole family booked in with me on Saturday and I was busy all weekend,’ Maria groaned.  
‘Apparently some guy was hanging around the town last Thursday and someone saw him taking a picture of your shop. He was asking questions about you as well.’  
Your stilled, dark eyes widening while your face lost color, below your cloud of wildly curling hair and the posture of your body screamed tension. Just a few inches over five feet in height, you reminded a much taller Maria of a delicate doll when you had first met each other, but she had later appreciated that nobody as down-to-earth and quirky as you could be seen for long in that light. However, you were unquestionably beautiful and badly burned by your failed marriage, you preferred men as friends and concentrated your energies on your son and your business.  
‘What sort of questions?’you prompted, a chill of uneasiness burrowing in your gut.  
‘Whether or not you lived around here, and how old Mattie was.’  
‘He probably just wanted to try his chances with you’ Maria consoled you.  
‘I don’t remember any man coming in here last week,’ you pointed out, your concern grew.  
‘Maybe he lost interest once he realized you were a mother.’ Maria shrugged.  
‘I wouldn’t have told you about him if I had known you would get wound up about it. Why don’t you just call and tell …er…what’s his name?’  
‘Steve,’ you supplied stiffly.  
‘Tell him what?’ you asked.  
‘That you want a divorce. Duh’  
‘No one tells Steve what to do. He’s the one who does the telling. It wouldn’t be that simple once he finds out about Mattie.’ You shrugged.  
‘So go to an attorney and say what a worthless husband he was.’ Maria pointed out.  
‘He didn’t beat me up.’Maria grimaced.  
‘Why should such extremes be your only benchmark?’  
‘There are other grounds for divorce, like mental abuse and neglect, and what about the way he left you at the mercy of his terrible family?’  
‘It was his mother who was awful, not his brother or his sister,’ you pointed out wanting to be fair. ‘And I don’t think it’s right to say I was mentally abused.’  
Maria, whose temper was as hot, observed the younger woman with unimpressed eyes.  
Steve criticized everything you did, left you alone all the time, and got you pregnant before you were ready to have a kid.’ She pointed out.  
You were embarrassed to the core and gaped that you could have been so frank with Maria in the early weeks of your friendship, sharing secrets that you sometimes wished you had kept to yourself. Of course, back then, you had been steamed up like a pressure cooker of emotions and in dire need of someone to talk to.  
‘I just wasn’t good enough for him…’ you spoke the truth  
Growing up you had never been good enough for either of your parents and the ability to search out and focus on your flaws was second nature to you. Bored out of your mind as you were a daydreaming teenager, you had done equally poorly at the office skills course your mother had sent you on, shattering your mother’s dream of you becoming a personal assistant to bring home some money. Your mother lived in a fantasy world, which, along with the alcohol, had provided her with her only escape from the abuse of a bad marriage.  
Your father, whose only dreams related to making money without ever working, had wanted you to become a model, but you failed to grow tall enough for fashion work and lacked the slenderness necessary for it. After your mother’s death, your father had urged you to become a dancer at a club run by his shady friend and had hit you and thrown you out of the family home when you had refused to dress up in a skimpy outfit and attend an audition. It was years before you saw your father again and then in other circumstances which you preferred to forget. Yes, you had learned at an early age that people always expected more from you than you ever seemed able to deliver, and, sadly, your marriage had proved no different. It was for that reason that making your way in life to set up and run your business had added greatly to your confidence; for once you had surpassed your expectations.  
Yet when you had first met Steve and he had swept you off your feet, he had seemed to be your every dream come true, which in retrospect seems ridiculous to you. But love had consumed you up like a tornado and made you believe in the impossible before it tossed you away again.  
Somehow, and you had no idea how, you had truly believed that you could marry a rich, educated, and handsome man and make a go of it. But in practice, the challenges and the differences had proved insurmountable. Your background had come back to seriously haunt you, but your biggest mistake had been getting too friendly with your brother-in-law, Rick. Although, you reasoned warily, that had Steve been around more and made more effort to help you come to terms with your new life in Brooklyn you wouldn’t have been so lonely and wouldn’t have jumped at the offer of Rick’s company. And she had adored Rick, you acknowledged abstractedly, recollecting how wounded you had felt when even after your marriage had broken down Rick had not attempted to get in touch with you again.  
‘You are too good for that Steve,’ Maria emphasized.  
‘But you really should tell Steve about Mattie instead of staying in hiding as if you have something to be ashamed of.’ you turned your head away, your cheeks burning as you thought, If only you knew …Telling the whole unembellished truth would probably turn her closest friend off her as well, you reckoned painfully.  
‘I honestly believe that if Steve found out about Mattie, he would go to any lengths to get custody of him and take him back to Brooklyn to live,’ you replied heavily.  
‘Steve takes his responsibilities towards the family very seriously.’  
‘Well, if you think there’s a risk of Mattie being taken by his father, you’re wise keeping quiet about him,’ Maria said, although there was an uncertain look on her face when she voiced that opinion. ‘But you can’t keep him a secret forever.’  
‘Only, for now, it’s the best option,’ you declared, setting down your coffee to attend to a customer as the bell on the door sounded.  
Soon afterward, she went out to deliver a floral arrangement for a dinner party to one of the big houses outside the small town. On the way home, you collected Mattie, his high energy dissipated by a couple of hours of playing. The tiny house she rented on the outskirts of the small town had a garden, in which you had added a swing and a sandpit. You were proud of your small living space.  
Although the little house was clumsily painted and furnished cheaply, it was the first place that had ever been able to make you feel at home since childhood.  
Sometimes it seemed like a dim and unbelievable fairy tale to recall that after you had married Steve you had lived in a mansion filled with history, luxury, and priceless artifacts. Moving the furniture or the pictures around had been forbidden and redecorating equally frowned on because Donna, could not bear any woman to interfere in what she still essentially saw as her home. Living there, you had often felt like a guest who had outstayed their welcome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you find this story interesting? Should I continue? Kindly let me know in the comments.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Steve was pacing back and forth in his office. He had mixed feelings about seeing Y/N after all that had taken place.

Steve had told his assistant Shane to block all the calls and not to disturb him, and also instructed him to make preparations for his travel to the town you were living in.

Sam came in bustling through the door, he looked irritated. Sam was the CFO of the Brooks Enterprises, despite being the CEO's friend both Bucky and Sam had earned their positions before Steve took over the board.  
Bucky had been COO working alongside Steve and Sam and the board had deemed them a troubled trio.

'Why in the world is your assistant telling me and the board that you are busy all day today?'

Steve let out a frustrated sigh, 'Sitwell found Y/N, she is living in some town with a kid, possibly Rick's kid.' 

'She left me, without so much as a note, she left everything I gave her, even her bloody phone' Steve claimed angrily. He knew he could show his true emotions only in front of either Sam or Bucky. He had been bottling it up these emotions for so long. 

Bucky came in with barging through soon after Steve's eruption.

Bucky looked at Steve and then at Sam, trying to get some sort of information.

Sam mouthed, 'Sitwell finally found Y/N.'  
Buck nodded understanding the distress written all over his friend's face. 

Bucky and Sam sat down, 'So that's what has gotten you rattled?' Bucky asked.

'What are you going to do now?' Sam inquired.

'What's there to do, I have spent the better part of the last two years assuming the worst, I thought she was dead in a ditch somewhere, now that I have found her alive and well living with her kid, I am going to end this torture of a marriage once and for all' Steve barked.

'She has a kid?' Bucky asked.

Steve threw the file given by Sitwell. Photographs fell out. Sam picked up a photo of you kneeling and tying the shoelaces of a toddler, next photograph captured the toddler's smiling face, he looked a lot like Steve, Sam thought to himself.

Sam passed the photographs to Bucky. Bucky gasped inaudibly. That kid was all Steve if Steve had liveliness.

Sam never wondered why you left, he knew you were sad, anybody could have seen that Steve's mother Donna had made your life a living hell, Steve never gave you the time of the day, he had thrown himself in the work, he had always been a workaholic but after seeing you getting closer with his brother, he distanced himself from you. Sam and Bucky tried quashing his doubts but something had snapped. Steve's doubts had strengthened. 

Sam understood your decision to leave a marriage that was suffocating you, Steve being himself was pig-headed as always, your departure from Steve's life had turned Steve into a miserable son, brother, and boss.

Bucky was aware of the situation just as Sam was, but both of them knew, it was both of your jobs to clear up the suspicions and misconceptions.


	5. Chapter 5

Had there been anything good about your marriage for that matter your relationship with Steve? you asked yourself, and a picture of Steve popped up in your head. Your enormously handsome and stunning husband had initially felt like a gift…most beautiful gift you had ever received, yet you were never quite been able to repress the feeling that you didn’t deserve him and he deserved someone better than you. 

It had crossed your mind that most of the things that had happened to you in life had occurred were accidents. Mattie’s conception, your choice to board a bus that brought you to this town, you thought you were boarding a bus to your deceased grandfather’s town after you had left Steve in Brooklyn but boarded the wrong bus cause you were devastated and emotionally numb that you boarded a bus without checking the destination, and luckily or unluckily it also described your first meeting with Steve…  
He had run into you literally in the office hallway where you had worked as an office administrator before you ever met him, you were carrying some paperwork regarding some on-going project and he was too busy on his phone to look where he was going.  
Steve finally looked up what he had done when he saw papers flying everywhere. You were on the floor and all the paperwork was scattered around you. You had gathered yourself and started collecting the papers which seemed to be everywhere in the hallway. Steve started to help you collect the papers which were everywhere, being the gentleman and also the cause of your face-planting on the floor noticed that you had scraped your arms. He apologized profusely, when you looked up to see who it was you saw the most lovely blue eyes staring back at you, you were taken aback by his magnetism. It took you a while to gather your bearings and respond to his apology. He beamed when he found you staring with mouth agape. That son of a bitch knew what sort of effect he had on women.  
He took all the paperwork from your hands and when you protested and reassured you were fine, he pointed out your scraped palms. You hadn’t noticed that day just how overbearing and indifferent to all argument Steve could be, he had refused to listen to you told him that you did not need any medical attention. No, you had been cleaned up and bandaged within an inch of your life all because Steve’s charming smile had cast a spell over you. He asked if you knew where the first-aid box was, you told him you were fine, but he wouldn't listen and asked again about the first aid box you nodded, and meekly gave him the directions to the first aid box, not wanting to cause any racket in the office over minor injuries.  
That night you didn’t sleep, you were restlessly tossing and turning in your bed all night. You had never believed in love, promising yourself that you would never allow any man to have the kind of power over you that your father had over your mother. Despite the hard lessons you had learned you had taken one look at how Steve Grant Rogers treated you with utmost care without knowing you at all and you had fallen hard for him.

Steve had put you through months of hell, he didn’t call you even after saying he would, by canceling dates last minute without any explanation and most importantly by seeing other women and getting photographed by paparazzi with them. He had broken your heart repeatedly and crushed your self- esteem. But you had understood even then why he was treating you that way, he was, after all, a rich and handsome man, while you worked for peanuts at a small office that he considered to be a dump. He had known then you were not his equal on any level and the disparity had bothered him deeply from the start. Four months after that first encounter, however, Steve seemed to shed that attitude…

Steve had once told you that you belonged together, oh what a cosmic joke that statement was.  
You mixed as poorly as chalk and cheese, you accepted that fact painfully that you had to learn to live with, and you finally slept around four in the morning and trying to forget the childbirth you had to endure alone.   
There was hardly any floor space left in the shop once you had loaded the fresh flowers into the containers. Your fingers numbed by the morning temperature and excessive contact with wet stems and water, you rubbed your hands over your jeans to generate some heat.   
Mattie was out in the little backyard playing with his truck while making loud noises and you smiled at the sight of his delighted voice.  
‘Y/N……….’   
It was a dark and melodic voice that you had hoped never to hear ever again. You shut your eyes tight, refusing to turn round, telling yourself that you were imagining things and hearing voices…  
You recalled the loneliness you had felt in a house that was supposed to be your home and the absence of Steve from their bed once she had gotten pregnant and the agony of the lack of interest in her rapidly swelling body. A chill slid through your spine as you spun around.   
And there he was, Steve Grant Rogers, your husband, who had taught you to love him, taught you to need him, and then ensued to torture you by depriving you of his company. You were shocked, extremely, utterly shocked, your eyes widening, you were not believing your own eyes you could not acknowledge what you were seeing.   
Brownish blonde hair swept back, his beautiful steel blue eyes were cold enough to freeze hell, his dumb arrogant beard, and his stupid perfect face.   
He was an amazingly handsome man in his fabulous dark business suit of faultless cut and polished handmade shoes. He always looked immaculate…except in bed, you recalled when you had ruffled his hair and you had scratched marks in his flawless back.   
‘What are you doing here?’ you asked breathlessly…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How was this chapter?


	6. Chapter 6

‘We have some unfinished business,’ Steve said gently, his intense gaze wandering slowly all over you.  
And you went from feeling cold to hot and bothered. You felt your face warming up because you knew you did not look prim and proper with your hair loose around your face and only a touch of tinted lip balm on your face, not to mention the worn-out jeans, oversized sweatshirt, and tattered boots.  
Even though it was contrary because you wanted nothing between you and Steve to be passionate as it had once been when you had had no control over yourself, you resented his cool stare and politeness, it was the ultimate rejection of you as a wife, as a partner. You didn’t know what you expected him to do, but needless to say, you were disappointed. You looked up to observe him, and for a microscopic second, you saw his sculpted jaw clenching, his hardened gaze narrowing. Then you knew he had felt something just as you did after seeing him.  
The atmosphere was bubbling with tension. You felt a disturbing loss of courage and obscure your gaze, taking a step back while being startlingly aware of him. It shocked you that a man you now hated as much as you once loved could still have such a powerful effect on your body.  
‘You always look so enticing,’ Steve commented with a roughened edge in his voice that made her tremble, you wanted to block, or at least tried to block the reckless attraction you still felt.  
‘Do I really look that desperate to you?’ he continued.  
The brutal rejection may have cut you like a knife had you not seen the way his extraordinarily beautiful eyes stayed on you.  
You tore your attention from the face that haunted your dreams and nightmares alike and you suddenly found your nails really interesting.  
‘What are you doing here?’ you demanded again.  
‘I want a divorce. I need your address to mail you the papers,’ Steve spelled out. ‘Or did that not occur to you? Your vanishing performance was selfish and juvenile.’ Steve added.  
You wanted to throw something at him.  
‘You forced me to behave like that,’ you replied angrily.  
‘How?’ Steve snarled, advancing towards the counter, obviously more than ready for an argument.  
‘You wouldn’t listen to a word I said. There was nothing more I could do.’  
‘I told you that we can work it out,’ Steve reminded you in a tone of maddening disdain.  
‘But you never did work anything out with me, not in our relationship or our marriage. How could you…. when you wouldn’t talk to me? When I told you how unhappy, discontent and miserable I was what did you ever do to make anything better?’ you demanded as your eyes shimmering with heartache and reproach you remembered the lavish gifts Steve had given her instead of more tangible and meaningful things like his time and his attention.  
Straight away, anger flared in Steve, his stunning blue eyes flaming to counter the point you made…Bell on the shop door rang. Sandy, your assistant had arrived. The tension inside the shop was palpable and tense.  
Sandy’s eyes filled with confusion.  
‘Am I late?’  
‘No, no,’you hastily reassured your employee.  
‘I have to go back home for an hour, so you’ll be in charge.’ You notified.  
Without even looking in Steve’s direction, you went out to the back to get Mattie, pulling him into your arms and hurrying back to tell in an exhausted voice to Steve, I live a down the road at number seventy-four.’  
But before you could reach the door a broad-shouldered young man with cropped brown hair strolled in. ‘Fresh out of the oven!’ Peter exclaimed. Chocolate croissants for you and his highness…’  
‘Oh crap, Peter, I totally forgot you were coming today!’ you suddenly remembered. You made the arrangement the last week when you had last seen Peter at May’s place.  
‘Look, I have to go out for a little while, I better show you where the laptop is,.’  
Securing Mattie firmly to your hip, you dived back behind the counter with Peter close behind her and pointed out the barely working laptop that kept restarting.  
Peter rested love-struck eyes on your delicate profile. If you want I can come back when you’re here.’ Peter countered.  
‘No, that’s fine, Peter. Today is perfect,’ you insisted, turning back to head for the door where Steve was waiting in silence, his perceptive gaze pinned to the hovering young man, who was not attempting to hide his disappointment that you were leaving. Sandy will look after you.’  
You stepped out into the fresh air, aware of Steve’s presence by your side and also confused because if he had even looked at Mattie for ten seconds  
‘I’ll see you at the house,’ you said flatly, setting Mattie down and holding his hand because he was too heavy for her to carry anymore.  
‘I’ll give you a lift,’ Steve offered.


	7. Chapter 7

‘No, thanks.’ Without waiting for his reply, you crossed the road and began to walk away fast with Mattie wobbling along beside you. Outside working hours you used the van to get around, but when the shop was open it was needed to deliver orders.  
You had only gone twenty yards before a car pulled up beside you and the driver’s door opened. Then a tall man in a business suit climbed out. ‘Going home?’ Alex prompted. Get in. I’ll drop you off.’  
‘Thank you, Alex, but I’m so close it’s easier just to walk,’ you declared cheerfully, though all your thoughts were miles away, on Steve, he wanted a divorce.  
Had he already met someone else? Some high-society woman from an affluent background, much more suitable than you had been? You wondered how many other women he had been with since you had left and it made a tiny tremor of distressing emotional ache spread through your tender heart. You didn’t want Steve back, no, you definitely didn’t, but you also didn’t want any other woman to have him either. Where he was concerned, you were greedy. But it would be foolish to imagine that he might have been celibate since your departure, his brimming libido required constant indulgence…or at least it did until he saw you with enlarged breasts and thickening waistline and it had become embarrassingly, cruelly obvious that he did not find his pregnant wife’s body. So how could you possibly care what he had done and with whom since then?  
What you didn't realize was that it has started drizzling. Alex yanked open the passenger door of his car.  
‘Get in,’ he urged.  
‘You’re both getting soaked.’  
You scooped up your son and climbed in. Alex pulled in just ahead of the sleek BMW that was already waiting outside your home. He let out a low whistle of appreciation as he studied the lavish model.  
‘Whose car is this?’ Alex prompted.  
‘An old friend of mine,’ you replied as you stepped out of his car.  
‘Thanks.’  
As you attempted to turn away Alex walked around the car to rest a staying hand on her arm. Dinner with me tonight,’ he urged, his brown hopeful eyes pinned to your face.  
‘No strings attached, just a couple of friends getting a meal together.’  
Suddenly aware of his closeness, you stepped back from him, already aware that you were just few feets away from Steve and you were well aware that he was listening to the exchange.  
‘I’m sorry, I can’t,’ you replied gracelessly.  
I’ll keep on asking,’ Alex warned you. You almost winced at that redundant guarantee, as you had already known that Alex, local pub owner, and a recently thirty-year-old divorced man, was a relentless guy that didn't take a hint that a woman wasn’t interested. Since the day you had gone out with Maria for some girl time to his pub, he has asked you out at least a dozen times.  
Aware of the ice-cold scrutiny of Steve, you hastily slot the key into the lock on the front door.  
‘Why didn’t you just tell him that you were married?’ Steve asked.  
‘He knows that. Everybody knows that’ you returned irritably, making a point of flexing the finger that bore your wedding ring as you pushed open the door.  
‘But he also knows that I’m separated from my husband.’ You added.  
‘Our separation was never official,’ Steve countered, crowding her with his presence in the tiny hall before he moved on into the small living room.  
‘But I am surprised that you’re still wearing the ring.’ you shrugged your shoulders and made no reply as you unbuttoned Mattie’s jacket and hung it up beside your sweatshirt.  
‘Apple Juice.’ Mattie asked as he tugged at your sleeve.  
‘Try again kiddo' you said.  
‘Peese,’ Mattie said meekly.  
‘Do you want coffee?’ you asked Steve grudgingly. He had taken up a stance by the window and his height and wide shoulders were blocking the day light.  
‘Yes,’ Steve confirmed.  
‘Peese,’ Mattie told him helpfully.  
‘Say peese.’  
‘Please,’ Steve pronounced stubbornly and barely glancing at the attentive toddler.  
Once again you were taken aback by that noticeable lack of interest in your child. You expected Steve to be stunned by Mattie’s existence and, at the very least, be interested.  
‘Don't you have any questions you want to ask me about him?’ you enquired, your attention resting pointedly on Mattie’s curly head as he crouched down to take his beloved trucks out of the box to play with.  
Mattie liked things organized and tidy, everything in its place. You had an unexpected disturbing recollection of Steve’s immaculately neat office desk at the mansion and wondered if there were other similarities that you simply refused to see.  
‘When I will engage a lawyer to represent my interests, they can ask the questions,’ Steve responded very drily.  
‘So, you’re already convinced he’s not yours,’ you breathed in a very quiet tone, your lips sealing in contempt.


	8. Chapter 8

Your eyes swept up on Steve’s gorgeous blue eyes, his handsome mouth taking on a sardonic cast.   
‘How could he be?’  
Boiling frustration filled you. For a crazy second, you wanted to kick and punch him into a state where he would be forced to listen to you. But you were not a violent woman and he didn’t listen to you, or believe you, or even trust you, and he never had, at this stage of their relationship he probably never would. Wasn’t that another good reason as to why you had walked out on your marriage? Why were you were banging your head against a brick wall again? Not to mention the fact impossibility of staying married to a man who was convinced that you had had an affair with his brother?   
While you waited for coffee to be ready in the kitchen, you reached a sudden decision and took out your cellphone to call Maria, asking if it would be possible for her to look after Mattie for an hour.   
‘Steve is here,’ she explained stiffly.   
‘Give me five minutes, I’ll come down and pick Mattie up,’ Maria promised.   
You set a mug of coffee down near Steve. You knew what you had to do next but you didn’t want to. Been there, done that. Maria arrived very quickly, bridging the awkward silence with her chatter while you got Mattie into his coat again.   
‘Steve…Maria,’ performed the introduction stiffly.   
‘I’ve heard so much about you,’ Maria said brightly to your husband.   
‘None of it good.’  
Steve sent you a censorious look of arrogance and you reddened, wishing that Maria had kept quiet rather than revealing how much she knew about your problems.   
The silence left after Maria’s departure was tense.  
‘ I did not sleep with your brother.’  
Steve shot you sharp glance.   
‘At least he had the courage not to deny the charge’ Steve rebutted  
‘Oh…right,’you sliced in, rage bubbling through you that had stemmed inside her.   
‘Rick didn’t deny it, so I must be lying!’ you countered.  
‘My brother has never lied to me but you have,’ Steve pointed out.   
Your hands clenched into fists.   
‘What lies? What are you talking about?’ you asked.  
‘You went through thousands and thousands of dollars while we were still living together, yet you had nothing to show for your extravagance and could not even cover your own expenses in spite of the generous allowance I gave you. Somewhere in that financial mess, when I asked you for an explanation, there must have been lies,’ he determined.   
You had turned white like a sheet, she could not deny his statement. You had used a terrifying amount of money, although you hadn’t spent it on yourself. You had nothing to show for it, however, and you had found yourself in the embarrassing position of not being able to pay bills during the last weeks of their marriage. Al your sins had come back to haunt you, all because of the one seemingly harmless and seemingly even sensible little lie that you had told him when they’d first met.   
‘Did you give all that money to Rick?’ Steve asked her abruptly, his voice harsh.   
‘He is often in debt and I was afraid that he might have asked you for money.’  
For a split second, you were tempted to tell another lie to cover yourself, and then humiliation stabbed you and turned your head, refusing to look at him. Although, while on one level you were still angry with Steve’s brother for throwing her under the bus by refusing to deny the allegations of an affair, you had enough fondness for the younger man not to seek revenge and to tell the truth.   
‘No, Rick never asked me for money.’  
Steve’s powerful body stiffened. He flicked you sharp glance so sharp.   
‘I assume that you are still in contact with my brother?’  
That comment surprised you.   
‘No...I’m not....I haven’t talked to Rick since I left Brooklyn.’  
Steve did not attempt to hide his surprise at that news.  
‘I’m amazed, you both were so close.’  
Your jaw clenched. For the first time, you were tempted to simply tell him the truth. Unfortunately, you had promised Rick that you would never betray him. After all, you had seen for yourself and on more than one occasion why the younger man was quite so determined to keep that particular secret from his family. Regrettably, Rick’s selfishness had not made you selfish and you kept quiet about him. Anyway, it was not solely Rick’s fault that your marriage to his brother had broken down.   
‘Rick has been working in London at our art gallery for the past couple of years. You haven’t had any contact with him at all?’ Steve persisted in a silky smooth tone.  
‘Is he supporting his kid?’  
‘Mattie is not his fucking kid!’ you said furiously.   
‘There is no need to swear,’ Steve murmured casually.   
You struggled to control the temper that was threatening to overwhelm you. Two years ago when you had walked out on your marriage you had been exhausted and worn down to the bone by the weight of the secrets you kept, but since then you had come a long way.   
‘Mattie is not Rick’s son,’ you replied.   
‘Your child is the only cause of dispute between us for the divorce,’  
Steve said, his stunning eyes full of criticism.   
‘Is that so?’ you asked tightly annoyed that he could so easily dismiss Mattie’s existence as an unimportant element.


	9. Chapter 9

Steve let out an unamused laugh. 

‘You know nothing about men,’ he breathed roughly. 

‘I’m much more interested in what you did my brother and why you felt the need to do it.’ Steve continued.

He tore you down the deceptive politeness and confronted you with the reality of his beliefs, and you were shocked by that attack. The experience also reminded you that you had never found Steve’s moods or actions easy to predict and had often failed to identify the why did he do and what drove him mad......

‘Did you fuck him in our bed?’ Steve spelled out, hands clenched so hard by his side. Scared, you stepped away from him, he reminded you of your father and his moods, when he would hit you because something did not go his way, you tried to move away which wasn’t easy to do in that small room. Steve was in an incendiary mood, you didn’t want to repeat the heated denials, which he had already heard and dismissed two years earlier. 

‘Steve…’ you murmured as quietly as you could. He flung his head back, his heated gaze over you. You were entrapped by his powerful charisma and it was like looking into the sun. You recalled the heated exchanges, the passion and the anticipation of the few nights he was home, you knew he would join you in the bedroom and take you to another world of pure physical bliss that would make you briefly forget your loneliness and unhappiness.

‘Are my questions too cheap for you? Did you ever think of what it was like for me to be forced to picture my wife in my brother’s arms?’ Steve said irately. 

‘No,’ you admitted, and it was the truth because she had never been intimate with Rick in that way and had wasted little time wondering how Steve’s offensive and unfounded suspicions might be making him feel. Angry with you? Disillusioned? You had already been much too familiar with the knowledge that he had to be experiencing such responses while you failed to live up to the high society standards of being a rich man’s wife. 

‘No, why should you?’ Steve growled rhetorically.   
‘Rick was simply a means to end your boredom, a destructive, trashy way of hitting back at me and my family’ he concluded  
‘That’s just nonsense!’ you replied furiously.   
‘Then why did you ever let him touch you? Was I not enough for you?’ Steve bit back bitterly.   
‘Do you think it didn’t hurt to imagine you naked with him? Sobbing with pleasure. Crying out as you came?’  
‘Stop it!’ you asked him begrudgingly, your face hot with chagrin at the repulsive sexual images he was creating.   
‘Stop it’ you pleaded.  
‘Does that ring a bell?’ Steve hissed. 

‘You got off easy for being a faithless, lying slut, so stop staring at me with those big shocked eyes. I won’t fall for the little-fragile-girl act this time around, I know you for what you are.... cheating, lying and scheming gold-digger’ Steve concluded.


	10. Chapter 10

Disturbed by the implicit threat in those hard words, you spun away and walked past him to the window, fighting to get a grip on the turmoil of emotions. He had shocked you very deeply, It had not until that moment struck her that his belief in your infidelity could have inflicted that much damage. Two years back when he had confronted you about Rick, he had been cold, controlled, behaving almost as though he was indifferent to you. By then you had believed that Steve felt very little for you and might even be grateful for a good excuse to end your unhappy alliance. Only now you recognized that you had been naïve to accept that surface show from a male as deep and emotional as he could be.

‘I didn’t have an affair with your brother,’ you muttered heavily, slowly turning back round to face him.   
‘And you should know now that my son, Mattie, is your son.’ you added.  
‘Is this is a joke?’ Steve demanded with a look of anger.   
‘I know that you miscarried before you left me.’  
‘We thought I had had a miscarriage,’ you corrected him.   
‘I went to see a gynecologist here, she told me that I was pregnant. She suggested that the bleeding I experienced was merely a warning my body gave me, I bled but did not miscarry our baby.’ you continued.  
‘I was still very much pregnant when I arrived here and Mattie was born just five months later.’  
‘That's not possible.’ Steve denied.

You yanked open a drawer and leafed through several documents to find Mattie’s birth certificate. You were on autopilot not fully aware of what you were doing but subconsciously you didn't know what else to do. Mattie was your husband’s child and that was not something you could lie about, you knew that a time would come when Mattie would want to know about his father. Taking out the certificate, you extended it to Steve. 

‘This does not make sense,’ Steve asserted, snatching the piece of paper from you.   
‘Well, if you can find some other way of explaining how I managed to give birth to a baby on that date then?’ you challenged.   
Steve stared down at the certificate with rage and then glanced up.   
‘All this proves is that you must have been pregnant when you walked out on our marriage. It does not automatically make that kid mine.’  
‘I know it doesn’t suit you to hear this news now and I really didn’t want to tell you. Too much time has passed since we split up and now we lead separate lives. But the point is, I can’t lie to you about it. Some day Mattie may want to reach out to you.’ You said defeatedly.  
Steve studied you with threatening fierceness.   
‘If that’s the truth, if that little boy is mine, it was spiteful and selfish of you to leave me in the dark about my child!’ you paled.   
‘When I left you I had no idea that I was still pregnant,’ you protested.   
‘Two years is a long time, and you never even made any attempt to inform me that I may be a father,’ he said harshly.   
‘I want DNA tests to confirm what you said before deciding what I want to do.’ Once again Steve was insulting you with the assumption that you had been an unfaithful wife and that, for that reason, there could be doubt over who had fathered her child.   
‘Do whatever you want, I know you are Mattie’s father.’ you told him curtly.  
‘I will arrange the tests and see you after I get the results’ Steve drawled.  
I'll contact a lawyer and start the divorce proceedings,’ you added in return, you did not want to be in that toxic marriage anymore.   
‘We should wait for the DNA results.’ Steve replied  
‘No.... I should have started the divorce proceeding the second I left you’ you lashed at him ’  
‘Then why didn’t you?’ He challenged.  
‘Get out’ you muttered not having the energy to keep arguing with him.   
You forgot how angry and frustrated Steve could make you feel with his arrogant need to take charge and do exactly what he wanted, regardless of what others felt.   
‘I'll be in touch,’ he replied.   
Anger shimmering coursing through you, you slammed the door after he left and watched him get into his car and drive away from behind the curtains.   
Nothing had changed. Being in the same room again as Steve brought back all the doubts, insecurities, and regrets you had left behind..... When you gave up on being his wife…


	11. Chapter 11

You left MJ, your neighbor’s teenage daughter and Mattie’s favorite human being other than you, in charge of the house and closed the front door as quietly as you could behind her. Thursday nights you and Maria went to the pub to enjoy a weekly night out with a couple of friends. You looked forward to getting out. Recently, you had been in a bad mood and full of resentment.   
‘Drink up,’ Maria urged you to drink the gin and tonic she got for you.   
‘You’re letting this whole DNA-test thing eat you alive and it’s not healthy for you.’  
‘I feel humiliated,’you confessed.   
A condescending attorney from Steve’s side had called you to give the requirements. You struggled with the fact that your husband doubted that Mattie was his child. You knew that you would never forgive Steve for forcing you to undergo that demeaning process, all because he was convinced that you had an affair with his younger brother.   
After a few drinks, Maria left with Rhodey, her boyfriend. She offered to drop you off, but you wanted to walk to clear your mind, so you declined.  
You saw Steve’s BMW parked outside the pub before you saw him, leaning up against the car and apparently waiting. You let out a sigh.  
You were spent and you did not want to indulge in mind games, you walked past him.  
‘How did you know where I was?’  
‘The babysitter,’ Steve told her softly. ‘I’m sorry for intruding on your evening.’Steve added in an arrogant tone, looking down at his tiny wife.  
‘Let's go,’ Steve said raggedly, yanking open the car door. He almost lifted your slightly tipsy body into the passenger seat and with his hand, he protected the crown of her head from a painful bump courtesy of the roof.   
Steve’s arms had been the only place you ever felt secure……you reminisced.  
‘What are you doing here?’ you asked once you reached your place.   
‘We'll talk inside.’  
You went in and relieved MJ of her duties and paid her.   
MJ lived nearby and this arrangement suited both of them.   
‘Do you leave a kid in charge of Mattie?’ Steve enquired.   
‘MJ is responsible and Mattie loves her ’   
‘I wanted to see my son,’ Steve confessed.  
‘Mattie’s asleep.’  
‘I still want to see him,’ Steve confessed excitedly  
‘You didn’t believe me when I told you he was yours’  
‘Let’s not get into that. I know the truth now. I know he is my kid. I got the news this morning. I came as fast I could.’  
His eagerness to see Mattie disheartened you, even while you tried to tell yourself that his reaction was only to be expected. He had just found out that he was a father. Naturally, he was much more interested in Mattie than he had been when he had assumed that your son was some other man’s.   
‘I'll take you upstairs’  
Steve moved quietly into the bedroom and studied the sleeping child in the wooden cot. His curls tousled around his cute little face, Mattie looked peaceful and absolutely adorable. Steve stared down at the child that slept.   
Steve looked across. ‘I want to take him home… to Brooklyn.’

That declaration hit you like a bucket of ice water. You backed away to the door and watched Steve award his son an affectionate last glance. Yes, he could be tender when he wanted to be but it wasn’t a notion that took him very often. He had looked at you the same way the day you had told him you were pregnant and he was over the moon, his reaction made you hide your own polar opposite feelings about the pregnancy. 

Steve wanted to show Mattie off to his family and friends...  
‘What did you mean when you said you wanted to take him back to Brooklyn?’ you heard yourself ask abruptly.   
Steve took off his heavy overcoat and draped it on a dining chair by the table.   
‘I cannot let you have full custody of my son,’ Steve spelled out.   
‘I don’t think that you can offer him what he needs to thrive in this environment. I don’t want to fight you for custody of our child but I don’t see how I can do anything else.’

‘How… dare…you? I gave birth to your precious son alone and I’ve been on my own ever since. Mattie is a very happy and well-adjusted little boy and you don’t know anything about him, yet the minute you find out he exists you conclude that I am an incompetent parent?!’

‘Does he even know he has a father or a family in Brooklyn? What kind of stability can you give him? You are not a responsible person.’ Steve retorted.  
‘What makes you believe that?’ you interrupted thinly.  
‘Look at the way you dealt with our marriage, your debts, your affair with my brother’ he added.

‘For the last fucking time, I did not have an affair with your brother!’ you shouted.  
‘You don’t face your problems head-on, you run away the minute things get tough,How can you possibly raise our child properly and teach him what he needs to know’ Steve condemned.   
‘I don’t have to stand here and be criticized by you. We’re separated and I need you to leave.’  
Steve grabbed his coat. ‘It’s impossible to talk to you,’   
‘You call threatening to take my child away from me talking? How did you expect me to respond to a threat like that?’ you questioned.  
‘It is not a threat, it is a promise, I will fight you for custody of my son,’ Steve refusing to back down.   
‘You can’t do this to me, Mattie is my son and he needs me.’  
‘It is my turn to be a parent to Mattie for a change,’ Steve said ironically.  
‘Call me when you come to your senses,’ Steve drawled as he tossed a business card down on the little shelf in the hallway. 

And in a moment he was gone and you broke down, all conflicting emotions and regrets coming back to you. You were furious with yourself because you hadn’t sorted out anything   
He believed you had slept with Rick and he hated you for it.   
You lifted his business card and threw it on the dining table. Steve was calling the shots again and you didn’t like that at all.


	12. Chapter 12

Three years earlier when you both were dating, you had liked the way Steve had been protective over you, and you were delighted by protective instincts. Looking back, you had treasured the way he had made you feel….. Oh, you were so fucking naïve. Steve was the first guy that made you feel wanted, sure you had had plenty of boyfriends, but none of them were as caring and gentle as he was…as a result, you had been far too quick to amplify what you had with Steve and believed that you had something special together. You had not even recognized him for the womanizer he was until one of the office staff members had shown an article on the gossip website, pointed to a photo, and said,   
‘Isn’t that the guy you’re dating?’  
It was a picture of Steve at some snobby Manhattan party with a beautiful blonde named Sharon Carter on his arm, they looked quite immersed in each other. It had been a blow to your chest. The caption had made it clear that he enjoyed the company of multiple women especially elite socialites. You didn’t want to believe the article, even when Steve never defined your relationship…He would often cancel dates at the very last minute and rarely call despite promising to call. When you questioned him, however, Steve had been forthright. 

‘I’m not looking for anything serious and I definitely don’t do relationships. I like hanging out with you but I like hanging out with other women too’ He said unapologetically.

You felt cheated, stupid and hurt, like any sensible person you told him you could not be something that you were not and proposed staying friends out of your underlying feelings for him, not wanting to part away from him. You had started going out on dates again. Not too later you had started dating someone else too, a salesman. But when Steve realized that you were seeing another man, he hated it, and didn’t miss any opportunity to belittle your boyfriend. Due to which you had stopped talking to him. You were heartbroken at losing him at the time. Needless to say, your relationship with the salesman withered too…

It took you a while to jump back at the horse of dating again…but you started going out more and enjoyed occasional hook-ups too..

Steve came back two months later and said that he would stop seeing other women and date you exclusively if you did the same. You had been ecstatic and you began your relationship right where you left it, this time around your relationship had entered a far more strong second phase. He rented an apartment near the office where you worked and you spent every spare minute there together. 

You had been happiest during the romantic weekends he’d shared with you than you had been your entire life. The hectic life of business and family responsibility had often kept you both apart, and on your twenty-sixth birthday Steve had asked you to marry him. He had not said he loved you; he had never told he loved you. He merely said that he could not continue spending so much time without you and this was the next course of action. 

Within weeks of his proposal, you had married in a courthouse with your childhood friend Gamora, and Sam and Bucky present, his friends were the witnesses. Those bitter memories still plagued your mind and gnawed your soul, but you lifted your head high, this was not just about you and you had grown these past two years. That silly infatuated and insecure girl was no more, she had been replaced by a strong, independent, and confident woman. This time around you were in control of your own destiny and, with that in mind, she snatched up her phone and called Steve. 

‘We have to meet to talk about Mattie,’ you told him assertively.   
‘Couldn’t you have decided that while I was at your house?’ Steve questioned.   
‘I’m not like you. I don’t everything mapped out,’ you reasoned defensively.   
He suggested that you and Mattie meet him the following afternoon at his apartment.   
‘I know you want to see Mattie again, but we’ll probably argue and I don't want him to see that .’ You reasoned.


	13. Chapter 13

At Steve’s rented luxurious apartment--  
You waited outside in the Luxury Apartment’s reception area. Apparently, they had called him to inform your arrival but no one picked up so the receptionist asked you to wait there itself.  
You caught your reflection in the glass of an interior window and decided that you looked out of place in blue sneakers, blue jeans, and a pink sweatshirt. You never spent much on clothing, you preferred to pump your profits either back into the shop or your savings account. Having survived a childhood in which cash was often in very short supply, you only felt truly safe now when you had a healthy balance in your rainy-day account.

The receptionist’s phone rang, you were escorted to Steve’s private elevator, obviously Steve would never stay anywhere which did not accommodate his wishes.  
He opened the door, his hair still wet from the shower, you blankly stared for a second or two….

Steve was the most absolutely beautiful man you had ever seen and your heart was jumping inside.

‘Is the sitter looking after Mattie?’ he enquired.   
‘Yes, but he attends playschool in the afternoons,’ you explained.   
‘We can’t reasonably hope to share a child when we’re living in different cities,’ he told her.   
You tensed and ran a hand down your jeans.   
‘Other people manage it…’  
‘I want my son to grow up in Brooklyn…’ Steve concluded  
‘You can’t always have what you want,’ you pointed out flatly.   
‘I am giving you a choice…’  
‘What sort of a choice?’  
‘Option one: you return to Brooklyn and give our marriage another chance. Or, option two: I take you to court over Mattie and we fight for him. It is the only deal I am going to offer and this is more than you deserve.’  
‘That’s a crazy idea,’ she said weakly.   
‘If you take into account our son’s needs, it’s the only practical solution.’  
‘If we were not happy together, how could Mattie possibly be happy with both of us? I don’t understand why you’re even discussing the idea of us living together again.’

‘Are you really that naïve?’ I still want you…… If I didn’t…I wouldn’t be offering you this alternative.’  
‘Are you saying that you’re able to forgive me for the past?’ you asked.

Steve let out a harsh laugh. ‘No, I’m saying that if I get you back, I will make an effort to overlook your past transgressions.’  
‘I don’t want to be tied to you again, it was hell for me.’  
‘I’ve made a life for myself here in this town….. and I enjoy my life here, I was miserable in Brooklyn and you didn’t seem any happier with me as a wife. Why would you want to revisit the past?’ you responded.  
‘Because we have a son.’ Steve gave a sarcastic reply. 

‘And this time around life could be much more straightforward.’  
‘How?’ prompted baldly, wanting every detail of his thoughts even though she had no intention of accepting his offer.   
‘I know you for who you are now, a gold digger and an unfaithful one at that. I would have no expectations, no sentimental ties. Our marriage would be a facade for Mattie’s benefit. All I want from you is some superficial husband-wife relationship…. ’   
‘And sex,’ you added…  
‘Without that, I wouldn’t even have considered taking you back.’  
‘You hate that you are still attracted to me, you commented.   
‘I do. This is the only way I can get you out of my system.’ He added.  
During those final weeks of your marriage, he hadn’t seemed to notice you at all and his increasing indifference and long working days had made you feel invisible and insignificant. 

‘I can’t just go back to Brooklyn, I’ve worked hard to build up my business. I don’t want to lose it’ you told him again.  
‘I can cover the cost of a manager for a few months. That will give you enough time to come up with a more permanent solution.’  
‘I can not live with you again Steve.’  
‘That decision is yours to make.’ Steve shrugged.


	14. Chapter 14

Previously –   
‘I can not live with you again Steve.’  
‘That decision is yours to make.’ Steve shrugged  
‘I’ve missed out on two years of my son’s life and I don’t want to waste any more time. My lawyer is waiting to hear whether or not I want to file a custody claim.’  
‘Do expect me to make up my mind about it right here and now?’ you gasped.   
‘Why not? I’m not in the mood to be easy-going or considerate. I doubt you suffered any sleepless nights while you denied me the chance to get to know my kid.’  
You had certainly kept far too many secrets from him, had spent a lot of money, but that did not mean that you were prepared to have your heart ripped out of your chest again... But you did, however, love Mattie very much. And you could not argue with Steve’s claim about denying him his son…  
‘I could come and stay in Brooklyn for a few weeks,’ you suggested an alternative.   
‘That is pointless.’  
‘I can not possibly sign up to return to our marriage for the rest of my life.’ You said helplessly.   
‘Maybe I could consider staying in Brooklyn for some time, how about…three months?’  
Steve frowned. ‘And what would that get us?’   
‘We will know by then if such an arrangement can work… and I would still have a life to return to town if it wasn’t working, but you have to promise me, you won’t start the custody proceeding till this probationary period is over’ you argued vehemently  
We can’t live together again…,’ she protested in an enervated rush, folding her arms and walking around the room in a restive circle.   
You want our son to suffer the consequences of coming from a broken home?’  
‘We can’t make everything perfect for Mattie.’  
No, but it is our responsibility to give him the best, even if that means making personal sacrifices.   
‘I want what’s best for Mattie too...’  
‘You didn’t have a problem raising him without me,’ he pointed out.  
‘If you truly do want what’s best for our son, come back to Brooklyn.’  
He was emotionally blackmailing you, he knew how to push your buttons.   
If your best hadn’t been good enough two years back, how much worse would it be this time? Had she ever really given him your best?. You had matured, were much wiser, and more confident, you reminded yourself. If things wouldn’t work out…the subsequent fall-out would hurt you again………   
‘Alright. I'll come back to Brooklyn but I’m only going to stay for three months,’ you said.  
‘Ok..’ he replied  
‘I should get back to the shop.’ You added awkwardly.  
‘I will ask my assistant to find you a manager,’ Steve said.   
‘I also want to see Mattie.’ He quietly added.  
‘Are you staying in town till tomorrow? Steve nodded.  
‘You can see him tomorrow.’ You replied   
‘When will you come to Brooklyn?’ he prompted.   
‘As soon as I get things arranged here.’  
‘I will drop you off,’ Steve murmured as you started leaving.   
‘It is fine, I will catch a bus’ you assured.  
‘Let me drop you off at the bus stand.’ He walked up to her.  
There was an immediate change in his demeanor. He still believed it was his job to look after you.   
He was standing in your space, much too close…… You saw your Steve, the one who always wanted to be with you, the man who made her breakfast because she hated cooking, the man who would get you food from the food trucks you loved because you told him expensive food does not taste as good. He looked like your Steve who let a business deal go down the toilet, cause you caught the flu and to quote him ‘your health is important than a business deal, I can not work, not when you are sick…’ He was looking at you with the same longing, wanting you to make a move. You snapped out of the spell and made your way towards the elevator.  
He followed your lead and dropped you off  
‘I will see you tomorrow,’ you said firmly still feeling the charged atmosphere.   
After an uneventful bus ride, you walked to Maria’s place.   
Twenty minutes later, you were sitting in the living room, you just needed your friend as you told her about the events that occurred today.   
‘You’re not serious about this, are you…? I thought you hated him.’ Maria questioned  
‘I don’t have any other option if he fights me for custody in court, he will win, he has the resources and I can’t lose Mattie, Maria, I just can’t, if I have to stay married to Steve for Mattie’s sake I am willing to do that’ you sobbed, it had taken a toll on you.  
‘You were so stressed when I first met you and you had no self-confidence. You were always anxious and that’s what being married to him did to you.’ She said apologetically, she hated the fact that her friend had been anxious, sad, and lonely. She hated what Steve did to you and has been doing that to you again.  
‘There was so much wrong in our life but not everything was his fault.’ You replied.  
‘Moreover, Rick is in London now…one less problem for me’ you added.   
‘You want to give your marriage another chance, don’t you’ Maria registered in a tone of quiet comprehension.   
‘If that’s what you want, I am going to support you no matter what’


	15. Chapter 15

You asked Steve to meet you in the playground near your house,  
Steve was dressed in a brown jacket, white t-shirt, and faded blue jeans, he looked like a model, he got several looks both from men and women in the park due to his tall, muscular frame.  
You tried not to gawk and focused your attention on Mattie, who was fastened securely on the swing and would laugh whenever he was pushed forward.  
‘He is beautiful,’ Steve remarked. He is very much a mini-me, though he has your curly hair.  
‘I told him about you,’ you informed him.  
‘How did he react?’  
‘He is excited about the idea of having a Dad,’ you confided. 

'Mattie laughed and smiled when Steve began pushing the swing after you moved to sit on the bench.  
Mattie tried to show off to his father and jumped off the swing before it came to a stop and fell, bursting into waterworks.  
Steve scooped him up and took him to the sand pit to distract him and Mattie quickly stopped crying. You never expected Steve to be good with kids. You watched him crouch down to wipe Mattie’s tear-stained face, Mattie suddenly flung his arms around Steve and hugged him and hid his face in Steve’s shoulders. You saw Steve gulping down the swelling emotions and warmth, you could see he was struggling to hold back his emotions and how he tightly hug Mattie back and began kissing his head. 

Steve set him down again and in high spirits, Mattie scurried over to you and grabbed your hand. ‘Ducks…ducks,’ he urged and, turning his head, he called, ‘Dad…Dad!’ as if he had been calling Steve that all his life.  
‘Now we go and feed the ducks,’ you explained to Steve.  
Mattie was walking ahead of them, they walked along the wide path by the lake. 

‘He is perfect’ Steve commented.  
‘I think so too……but then again, we both are biased’ you replied.  
While Mattie fed the ducks and introduced them to Steve. A lot of what Mattie said was blabber but Steve indulged him.  
Mattie stretched out his sting hand to hold his father’s finger.  
‘Your assistant called, he emailed me some CVs ’ you told him.  
‘That’s great,’ Steve pronounced.  
‘What did Rick offer you that you couldn’t get from me?’

Those words felt like a knife slicing through you.  
‘I want to know,’ Steve added curtly.  
‘He listened to me, valued my opinion, spent time with me, which is more than you ever did!’ you told him defeatedly.


	16. Chapter 16

A month later, Steve’s driver came to pick you and Mattie from the airport. You wished that Steve would come to pick you up but you were not surprised when his driver came. Steve was an extremely busy man and, as his wife, had to accept it, well you were forced to accept it.  
You hated that you had to leave your home and your business.  
Natasha was an amazing manager, she had taken over the shop’s responsibilities effortlessly.  
It was not for nothing, compromising with Steve had let keep Mattie with her. He was securely strapped in the car seat, and he was with her, that’s all that mattered.  
Mansion had been located in the suburbs of Brooklyn.  
Steve was wrapped in the demands of his vast business empire, and had little time to spare.  
When the car finally stopped, Mattie stared at the Mansion with curious eyes . You were wearing jeans and an oversized blue t-shirt, you left Mattie in the car and rang the bell of the giant front door. 

You were greeted by a middle-aged housekeeper, Gina, but she stepped back as soon as she heard Donna come to the door, an older woman with greying hair who carried herself with great pride, her cold hard blue eyes filled with rage.  
‘How dare you come back to my home after you broke my family?’ Donna erupted blocking the doorway.  
Her daughter, Rebecca, intervened weakly,  
‘It’s great to see you again Y/N… Mom... please…… Steve talked about this .’ Rebecca commented.  
Your sister-in-law was concerned for you and embarrassed painfully cause of her mother’s rude behavior and callousness towards you.  
The driver was getting out the luggage while Rebecca stared behind you, at the child she could see gazing through the window of the car.  
‘Is that Mattie? Can I meet him?’ you nodded.  
Rebecca went out to get Mattie. The driver hoisted up the luggage and stepped past Donna.  
‘Afternoon to you too, Donna,’ you said stoically, following the driver indoors. You were determined not to give her any reaction, you could not let Donna see that she had the power to get under your skin. You knew Donna, she would undeniably attempt to bully you but you had learned not to care about it.  
Rebecca returned holding Mattie’s little hand in hers.  
‘Mom, look at him,’ she urged with enthusiasm.  
Donna gazed at her first grandchild and her hostile stare softened for an instant before she shot you a forbidding look.  
‘This little boy is the one and the only thing you have done right.’ She commented.  
You did not want to indulge her so you did not reply.  
What was there to say? Steve’s mother would never accept you. Her son had married an ordinary woman, rather than the wealthy socialite Sharon Carter, and Donna was too stubborn, arrogant and narrow-minded to change her attitude. When you first came to this house, Donna had done everything possible to ensure that her daughter-in-law’s daily life was as miserable as she could make it. This time around, however, you had no plans to comply with her bullying.  
Rebecca along with Mattie accompanied you to your room.  
‘Steve has hired a nanny to help you with Mattie,’ Rebecca announced.  
‘How very thoughtful of him,’ you remarked sarcastically.  
‘I decorated this room for Mattie,’ Rebecca announced proudly, she stopped in front of a door near your room and opened the door excitedly you saw a fully furnished nursery complete with a bed and piles of toys.  
‘If you want you can choose another...’ Rebecca hesitated.  
‘This is super amazing. Did you buy the toys?’ you asked.  
Rebecca chuckled.  
‘No, this is all Steve. Can you believe Steve went shopping?’  
‘I don’t believe it’ you admitted, as Steve hated shopping with a passion. You were conflicted, hated that you had to leave your home but you were touched by the efforts he had made for Mattie. Was buying expensive toys for Mattie supposed to be a substitute for his presence in Mattie’s life? Had Steve begun neglecting Mattie just as he did with her?  
Mattie walked into the room to inspect toys, he was fascinated by a fire truck and grabbed it, and started playing with it. His aunt was engrossed in him just like you. You turned to observe Rebecca…  
You felt sorry for Rebecca, she lost her husband in Afganistan and had suffered from clinical depression since his death, Steve had found Rebecca on the verge of suicide and brought him back to their house to recuperate. She always tried to protect you from her mother, but Donna was relentless, she would find one way or other to hurt you..


	17. Chatper 17

Lily, the nanny Steve hired came to visit. You chatted with her, wanting to know her experience as a nanny, after satisfactory responses to all of your questions, you left Mattie with Lily and Rebecca. The old room that you shared with Steve before you left had been unrecognizable. The paint, the furniture had been changed.  
It looked pretty depressing.  
Steve’s absence at the airport had fuelled the suspicion that you were about to witness that nothing had changed in the marriage you had left behind. By hiring Lily, Steve had shown that only his opinion mattered and you did not like the feeling of being made an unnecessary accessory in your child’s life.  
You went for a shower and went to the dressing room to get clothes. It was a shock to open the closets and find all your old clothes and brand new clothes as well, all of the clothing in your size. Your clothes looked tattered in comparison. Obviously, Steve had ordered you a brand new wardrobe.  
Maybe he hated how you dressed and bought new dresses, or maybe he was embarrassed by your dressing sense.  
You changed into a blue dress before going to check on Mattie. He was playing happily in the bath with his rubber duckies while Lily watched over him. Lily told you that Mattie had already eaten his evening meal and you returned to the bedroom.  
You opened the door and froze. Steve was removing his tie. His tailored suit looked crumpled and almost dusty, his hair disheveled, and a dark shadow of stubble gracing his face. He still looked hot and sexy.  
As she studied him, her body reacting with treacherous enthusiasm even as her pride rejected those earthy responses, hot, heady anger  
threatened to consume her.  
I told Gina we would dine alone next door tonight. Give me ten minutes for a shower,’ Steve told you, his eyes roaming down your body, and he was not subtle about it. How in the hell can he still make you feel hot and bothered ……  
‘Why are you looking at me like that?’  
‘You’re too stunning to ignore,’ he told you mischievously.  
You were fighting to hang onto her irritation. You didn’t need a mirror to tell you were in a Steve’s magnetic trance...  
‘I am such an idiot! Why did I think this time around would be different…that you would make an effort for your kid’ you shouted  
‘What are you talking about?’ Steve demanded. You were blocking out and refusing to respond to the electric atmosphere.  
‘I came here a few hours ago. I was confronted by your mother before I even saw you again? Obviously, it never occurred to you that you should have been here for me!’  
‘I left a message with my mother for you. You didn’t receive it?’ Steve prompted.  
Your mother hates me, Steve. Do you really think she would take the trouble to give me a message?’ fired back at him.  
‘I am sorry, it was an oversight on my part,’ he said sincerely  
That cool and reserved response made you so livid, you tried to remain quiet.  
‘I hate you when you treat me like this!’ you hissed.  
You never wanted to be back here, you hated this gloomy place, yet here you were again, you were moments away from killing Steve, the sole reason for your stay here was Mattie, otherwise you would have never even looked at this place.  
‘You don’t hate me.’ he told you.  
‘And how do you know that? I couldn’t stand you when I walked out on you and our marriage,’  
Steve moved towards her and you backed into the bedroom.  
‘But why? Because I had found about your affair with Rick? Or was that because I asked you to explain what happened to all that money?’  
‘I left you because you wouldn’t believe anything I said,’ you flung, Steve, frowned darkly.  
‘I’m hungry. I want to have some food. I don’t want to get into an argument right now.’  
A bolt of rage shot through you  
‘Steve…there’s never a right time with you. Look at what you did to us and our marriage and stop blaming me for everything that went wrong’  
We should leave the past behind us.’  
‘You don’t get to say that to me when all you do throw everything I did back at me!’ you hissed.  
Steve groaned out loud.  
‘Tell me then’  
‘You forced me to live under the same roof as your mother’  
‘This place is very large.’  
‘It’s not that simple. Donna hates me and she made my life a misery the last time I was here. What did do to stop her?’you condemned fiercely.  
‘How did she make your life miserable?’ Steve said in tone of disbelief.  
‘ I was treated like a guest, no fuck that, I was treated like an uninvited tenant, if I asked any of the staff to do anything they had to run it by your mother first because she insisted that all requests go through her.’  
I never got anything I wanted, I could not do a simple redecoration of our room without her saying no and I found that mortifying. She criticized everything I ever did, refused to speak to me unless she was snidely commenting about every flaw that I have when you weren’t there, and insulted me to my face in front of visitors. Ask your sister.’  
‘I will check it out.’  
‘Great, just fucking great, you can’t take my word on that either?’  
‘What else?’ Steve inquired.  
‘It’s your fault that I fell pregnant with Mattie!’  
Steve looked puzzled.  
‘You hated that you were pregnant?’ he looked hurt.  
‘I did…… when I first discovered that I was pregnant. You were supposed to be responsible, you knew that birth control pills don’t agree with me, but you chose to be careless with protection and I paid the price for it,’. We had only been married a few months and I was still young and unprepared. I didn’t feel ready for a baby and being constantly sick while I was carrying him didn’t help.  
‘It made me feel more trapped than ever but you didn’t understand how I felt, did you?’  
‘No, I didn’t, but then again you didn’t tell me, I knew that you were miserable but I thought that was because you were sick.’Steve countered.  
‘And Mattie is not a mistake, he is the most precious gift,’ Steve added angrily.  
Your eyes teared up.  
‘I didn’t mean that he was a mistake…’  
‘Then what did you mean?’ Steve condemned.  
‘There you go again…you always think the worst of me’ you accused him,  
‘No, I don’t.’ Steve grabbed your shoulders in a sudden movement and pulled you against his body.  
‘It’s hard for me to understand how you can love Mattie and still regret the pregnancy.’ he murmured in your hair  
You welcomed the warmth he offered.  
‘I don’t regret it anymore.’ You replied  
‘You are still accusing me of moment’s forgetfulness we both had.’ He added begrudgingly as he kissed your hair, familiarizing himself with your scent once again..

The atmosphere changed from confrontational to electric,  
You could feel your blood pounding, heart racing, and the pull of his body. He lowered his head and kissed you fiercely, his lips taking your breath away. You were not even aware of the moan you let out.  
He kissed you until your heart threatened to jump out of your chest. You were left breathless, hot, and bothered no longer thinking straight. You became a puddle in his embrace, pure carnal desire that was all that you could feel.  
You felt him tear your dress in desperation.  
You felt it sliding down your body. Steve lifted you, you kicked off the shoes as you both dropped on the bed. Pure desire and hunger were driving you crazy.  
‘We shouldn’t,’ you told him weakly, as you stroked his lips with your thumb.  
‘Do you want me stop...? because I am in no mood to play games tonight’ Steve said huskily.  
You were shocked...  
‘What do you mean…?’


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning- Smut alert.

‘No commitment, no sex,’ Steve summarized.  
‘That wasn’t a game!’ you protested, offended that he could even think that of her. From the moment you realized just how much power Steve had over you, you tried your best to protect yourself. Saying no to sex while he was out there fucking other women was common sense rather than manipulation.  
‘Why are you pretending?’ Steve murmured, lowering his head and kissing along the side of your neck before he followed that trail down south with his mouth.  
‘In the end, I only ever wanted you. I wanted you so much that having you began to seem like the only goal. And trust me it was heaven, my slice of heaven on earth’  
Your cheeks flushed.  
‘But it wasn’t a game. It might’ve been for you, it wasn’t for me. I never wanted to be a notch on your bedpost, I wanted and an actual, honest to god relationship with you because I liked you and cared about you’  
‘I know and that is why I married you,’ Steve reminded her relentlessly.  
You realized that he had always believed that it was the physical pull he felt towards you that he proposed to you…so you were always around, always available. Your marriage was based on a shallow foundation, was there any wonder that their relationship had failed? Nothing was lasting about lust it fades away, you told yourself…… Your body had it’s own mind, as you thrust your hips towards him, inviting him to continue...  
Steve's mouth traveled down to your boobs, enjoying the warm softness and licking and nipping them. You gasped when he started to roll your nipple between thumb and finger, licking the hardened nipples, you let out a moan in response.  
‘God, I love your boobs,’ he husked.  
You laid back on the bed. He twisted your one nipple while licking and biting the other one, he continued to massage your other nipple with his tongue. Steve had been obsessed with your boobs ever since you had started sleeping together, seeing you blissful Steve moved down south as he massaged your clit through your panty, you were already in a haze of ecstasy. Steve being the impatient man tore the panty in two. He dipped his fingers in your wet pussy eliciting a moan from you……He knew your nooks and crannies very well… his fingers massaged your G- pot persistently, meanwhile abusing your engorged clit from his other hand, Steve knew you were close and he continued his torture till you came. Steve did not stop even after your climax, he continued to flick your sensitive clit meanwhile fingering you single-mindedly, Steve wanted to see you wrecked……he loved making you a mumbling mess. You came again and this time the flood gates opened, it felt as though your brain had short-circuited with pleasure.

Steve haphazardly removed his pants and boxers, he opened the nightstand to grab a few condoms, he tore open the foil and rolled it over his cock which had been rock hard since he had seen you in your shop, you had that much control over him and you did not even know, you had been his curse, a curse he loved too much…  
He positioned himself between your legs and he hovered over your body, he grabbed your chin and kissed you forcefully, trying to communicate his want, his love, and his need for you…He pushed in his rock hard, veiny and thick cock inside you in one go. He groaned against your mouth, feeling your wet heat surrounding him made him go mad with passion, he grabbed your legs and put them over his shoulders, and started fucking you earnestly. His strokes were deep, rough, and fast, you felt his thickness spearing you, you could feel the ridges of his cock. He was splitting you in half and you were letting him do that, he was hitting all the spots and you were nearing your third climax of the night and by the looks of Steve he was not even close, you came again from him being inside you, his cock stroking your G-spot and punching against your cervix. Steve had to control himself, he felt your cunt tightening like a wet velvet, he did not want the night to end so soon, he wanted to refamiliarize himself with your body.  
‘Do you know how many times I have imagined this in the last few weeks?’ Steve asked you.  
You were trembling.  
‘Please…’ you said shakily…  
He pulled back and sat down and pulled you over him and entered your pussy again with vigor this time he let you take the control but soon after his impatience had him driving up his hips to meet your pussy, he needed to one with you again. He drilled your pussy with a series of hard thrusts of his painfully thick and large cock.  
Steve growled with passion, plunging himself deep in your pussy with urgency...  
You could hear someone screaming, it was you, screaming in pleasure, thrashing from the fourth climax that took over you and you took Steve with you.  
‘That was amazing,’ Steve said breathlessly, his arms keeping you close.  
‘I was afraid that I would not be able fuck you because of Rick.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It has been a while since I wrote Smut.... I apologize if it is not good.


	19. Chapter 19

‘That was amazing,’ Steve said breathlessly, his arms keeping you close.   
‘I was afraid that I would not be able fuck you because of Rick.’  
You opened your mouth to deny it.  
‘Don’t deny that. Every time you do, I get angry and it has been a very long and difficult day,’ Steve admitted.   
His rooted distrust and suspicion, made you feel the hostility that had taken a root in his heart. You pulled away from him and moved to the other side of the bed. The physical aspect of your marriage had always been amazing.   
‘We both need to accept the past… we cannot make this arrangement successful if we don’t accept the past’  
He had already refused to believe you and now was even refusing to even listen to your denials. His belief in your infidelity was unwavering.   
‘Shower, then dinner?’ Steve said, grabbing your hand and dragging you across the bed while he lifted you and took you to the adjoining bathroom.   
While you were showering your mind went to the place where it had been this afternoon.  
‘Where were you today?’ you asked abruptly as he turned on shower.   
‘John, one of the workers, had an accident, he tripped and fell over the balcony in the factory. He was badly hurt,’ Steve told her, his lips compressed into a bleak line.   
‘I was at the hospital, his children live in different states, his wife had no one and I did not want to leave her…… John didn’t make it, he suffered a severe brain injury and by the time I dropped off his wife home, it was late…’  
You were horrified.  
‘I’m sorry if I’d known I wouldn’t have said anything’  
‘It's fine....you didn’t know...’ Steve concluded.  
He had a difficult day.   
John’s wife, however, would have found Steve’s presence a source of great comfort and support because he was that kind of a guy, strong and reliable in times of crisis and you felt guilty.   
You didn’t bother getting dressed again. Clad in a purple nightie, you joined Steve in their bedroom, someone must have brought the dinner. He was wearing his PJs and a grey T-shirt that was too small for him and mapped his upper body like a second skin, he looked so fucking hot.The man was a sex machine both in and out of the bedroom. The way he carried himself exuded confidence, power and ....Damn Y/N for one in your life stop thinking from your pussy. You reprimanded yourself 

Steve studied you. Even with your hair in an untidy riot of curls still wet from shower and without a scrap of make-up, you were so beautiful with your fragile features, flawless skin, and kind eyes that had his full attention. Sex was better than ever between them but he wasn’t yet fully convinced that he had you were where he wanted you to be. Your three-month condition came to his mind. You were his polar opposite, you were impulsive, unpredictable, and extravagant.   
He could not predict your next move, once again, he was at war with himself, Steve recognized angrily. It was a familiar predicament where you were concerned. Steve was a man with a strong moral code, and yet here he was reconciling with his unfaithful wife, a wife who still refused to admit her guilt. 

A gold-digger who survived so long without his support because you took hundreds of thousands of dollars before you’d left him. Your escape funds. What else?   
He did not have a moral ground to judge you. He had used Mattie as a weapon and blackmailed you into returning and he didn’t feel guilty about it.   
He sipped his scotch. You make him happy, but you were bad news for him. 

The instant he’d seen men trying to date you in that backwater ditch of a town, he became territorial. The thought of you freely finding a new lover, a partner other than him had led to many sleepless nights.  
You were his and only his. And you couldn’t hurt him because he didn’t love her. He had never been in love. He knew what he was doing and why he was doing it.   
Steve got up after finishing his drink.

‘Where are you going?’ You asked.   
‘I am going to see Mattie and then bed.’  
You felt like a cheap whore, he had come to you, fucked you senseless and he wanted to sleep in a different bed so much for making it work for Mattie’s sake…  
‘I don’t appreciate you hiring a nanny without discussing it with me first,’ you confided.  
‘We can discuss that tomorrow,’ Steve said impatiently and a moment later he was gone, leaving you alone and cold. After a few minutes, you went to check on your son, he was sound asleep in his cot. 

Mattie didn’t have any trouble adjusting to a new room, new faces around him and a different place at all.   
He was indeed Steve's son, he had taken the change in scenery, new relatives and a new room in stride, his childhood was safe and happy unlike yours. There was no comparison between his childhood and yours, your troubled childhood painted your adult life with fear and anxiety. Mattie’s world had always been safe and his needs had always been met. He had never been denied love. He had never known violence and you were proud of the fact that you had done much more for him than your parents had ever done for you.


	20. Chapter 20

You flopped on the bed, you were jet-lagged but the thoughts racing in your mind would not let you sleep, so you turned on the TV, you needed something to divert your attention from your depressing thoughts. You had no idea when you fell asleep.   
You heard someone rifling around in the room, you immediately woke up, pushing hair out of your face and blinking as Steve turned off the TV.   
‘I must’ve fallen asleep,’ you mumbled drowsily.   
‘I am sleeping here tonight,’ he informed her with a distasteful look on his face, he had expected her to argue with him.   
You didn’t know what to think of his statement. It was already four-thirty in the morning according to your phone.   
You saw him shed his clothes and join you in bed. Also, he was hard. And you could not avoid it. Your were low key happy that you could still get him riled up and he couldn’t hide it. The separate-bedroom concept had bitten the dust at remarkable speed.   
‘I should be too tired for this’ Steve growled as he came on to you,   
‘But I fuck it, I can never be too tired for you.’ He confessed.

You gazed up at him with your come-get-me eyes and he was done.  
He tore off your nightie, impatient Steve, his hands groping your boobs, his fingers traveled south finding your pussy damp.   
‘I can’t wait,’ Steve said hungrily as he dove his face straight into your pussy, drinking from it as his life depended on it. He continued to suck your clit with desire, he loved the way you sounded when he nibbled your sensitive clit, you mewled for him, just for him and that was enough for him to shove two fingers in your warm, inviting pussy or his heaven. He fucked you with his fingers, made you come from just his skillful mouth, he watched you fuck yourself on his fingers, he loved the way you moved your body against his hand, after two orgasms when your body started shuddering from pleasure, he decided to make sure that you would come a third time on his cock, and with that in mind. His thick veiny cock entered you in a jolt, your body shaking in wave after wave of pleasure as he teased your nipple while destroying your pussy. He pounded into you at an inhumane speed till you felt an imminent release. You had an earth-shattering orgasm, which left you shaking in its wake.

‘Nobody but you can make me feel like an animal.’ Steve said as he kissed your cheek.  
The clouds of doubt had cleared. Nothing had changed. It was always all about sex as far as Steve was concerned. He had never loved you and even though you had never believed you were the wife he really wanted, he had still married you. That had never made sense to you. You never felt worthy of anybody’s love.  
Your mother never loved you, you were a disappointment to her, your father had been the same, though your mother pretended to love you, your father could not even pretend. There had been boyfriends but no one as serious as Steve and you had fallen so hard for him that the sheer pain of loving him and losing him had left you a shell of a woman you were.

You laid awake in the darkness, it was only the sex that kept him there…wasn’t that was better than nothing? You could walk away from him again without getting hurt, you lied to yourself. You consoled yourself that you didn’t love him any more; you had got over that nonsense.  
You believed that your friendship with Rick would make Steve happy…you were gelling well with his brother and sister…but it simply made him think that what you and Rick were having an affair. You sighed woefully and let sleep envelope you…  
You woke up when you heard the curtains being pulled. Sunlight blinded you and you got up. You must have slept like a log, you didn’t even stir when Steve left the bed.

You checked your phone to see that it was quarter-past noon. Gina set down the tray on a side table and asked if you wanted to have your breakfast in the dining hall or balcony instead. Gina handed you a bathrobe seeing as the state you were in.  
‘Thanks. I’ll eat in the balcony,’ you said, sliding out of bed and getting an item of appropriate clothing to wear. The balcony was overlooking the gardens, you heard a child’s laughter you noticed Mattie, who was playing with someone, likely Lily. 

You felt guilty, you didn’t give him any attention since you arrived in this house. You decided to spend the rest of the day with him.


	21. Chapter 21

After taking a long shower, you decided to head down in search of Mattie. You heard Donna screaming at somebody. You heard Steve’s voice too. The noise was coming from one of the reception rooms on the ground floor, you saw Rebecca emerge abruptly from the room.  
‘What’s going on?’ You asked.   
‘Mom is angry,’ Rebecca told you uncomfortably.   
‘Oh…’ you replied, you were slightly curious because you thought it wiser not to get involved in a family matter, you walked right past the door of the reception room.   
‘I am going out to the garden, do you want to join me?’ you asked Rebecca.  
Rebecca accompanied you, obviously relieved to leave the tense atmosphere.   
‘Steve has asked Mom to move to a house on the estate,’ she revealed.   
You were surprised by that news.   
‘That’s so sudden!’ you exclaimed, clearly unable to hide the wonder in your voice.

‘Her belongings are already being packed,’ Rebecca stated in a shocked tone. Mom is upset. I have never seen Steve so livid. She is supposed to move into a hotel until the house is ready.’ She told you.  
‘Wow!’ you replied. You didn’t pretend to be sad for Donna,   
‘I will miss Mattie,’ Rebecca admitted.   
‘Why are you moving out?’ You asked.   
‘Mom will want me to move with her.’ Rebecca said sadly.  
‘I don’t expect or want you to move out and I am pretty sure Steve won’t either,’ you stated because you knew that Steve loved his sister and was very concerned about her.  
‘Are you sure that you and Steve won’t mind if I stayed here?’ she asked worriedly.  
‘Of course, we won’t.’ you assured her.  
‘Mom would never forgive me for abandoning her…’ Rebecca concluded.   
‘I am not sure I could go against her’ she said quietly.  
Mattie ran towards you and threw himself at you when he saw you approaching. You laughed loudly, kissed his round cheeks, and cuddled him against your chest. You hugged your son close and asked Lily to take a break. Rebecca played catch with her nephew and you found herself hoping that your sister-in-law would have the courage to break free of her mother’s controlling hands and stay here.   
Steve sauntered out to join all of you. He looked downright sinful in his jeans and a blue t-shirt that fit his muscular shoulders and those tree trunks of biceps of his.  
Mattie grinned at his father and ran towards him. Rebecca left to see if she could assist Donna.   
Steve chased Mattie around in the garden. Mattie was laughing his hear out when Steve got a hold of him. When they had both had enough, Steve suggested taking Mattie down to the lake and loaded them into a car.   
‘What happened today?’ you asked Steve.  
‘If you had told me how Mom was treating you when we were first married I would have ended it. You should have been honest with me,’ Steve murmured.  
‘This was your home and as my wife, it is yours too…’ He added.  
‘I am not sure I would have coped with the responsibility.’  
All you wanted to do at that moment was to make him feel better rather than add another weight to his conscience.   
Steve hated it when he realized how much his mother detested you. He couldn’t imagine what you had been going through alone in the house.  
His face clenched hard from the thought of all the suffering you had endured.   
A brooding expression darkened Steve’s features.   
‘How my mother spoke of you today was enough to open my eyes at the level of hatred which I was dealing with. The only possible solution was for her to move out’  
‘Do you regret that?’ you asked Steve.  
‘How could I?’ Steve confided with a harsh laugh. ‘She was not ready to be a mother to any of us. She sent all three of us off to boarding school as soon as she could.’  
Then you were kinder to her than she deserved,’ You pronounced feelingly.   
‘But I can’t forgive myself for not seeing how she was treating you when I first made this your home.’ Steve stared down at you and reached for your hand that took you by surprise.   
‘I hope you can learn to love this place as much as I do.’ He said hopefully.

Moving his mother out of your shared house showed you that he wanted things to change for you and that he had already made the first move towards that.   
It was the expressive blue beautiful eyes that affected you the most. He really did want their marriage to work this time around and, might be because they now had a child together, he wanted you to be happy in Brooklyn. He cared about your happiness. It was a better beginning than they had first married…


	22. Chapter 22

You were supposed to host a charity event. You were very nervous. You stepped up to the podium with clammy hands and heart beating in your ears. You spoke about the need for a safe haven for the victims of domestic violence. The fund-raiser was to raise money for new premises where women and children could stay safe while rebuilding their lives.  
You were aware of Steve watching you. Rebecca was by her brother’s side and smiling cheerfully. You were happy that Steve had suspended a business trip so that he could accompany you to the evening event. You returned to their table. It was Rebecca’s idea and interest in this charity that you got involved in. You never told Steve that you felt a great sense of empathy with the frightened women and children you had met and talked to at the shelter.  
‘You were terrific.’ Steve told you, beaming with pride and affection.  
Over the past couple of months, you had seen a different side of Steve.  
Rick was never, ever mentioned, and neither was the disturbing question of all the money that you had taken.  
You and Steve were enjoying harmony that you both had never had in the past when he worked long hours that you were left to your own devices with no friends or social life. It was the isolation that had made you grateful for Rick’s presence and friendship. But Steve had learned how to make time for you and Mattie and he had made the effort to introduce them to his world. He had taken you to all the social gatherings, public outings, he also had introduced Mattie to his uncles, Uncle Sam and Uncle Bucky, Mattie had taken to both Sam and Bucky. He always asked his father about them.  
A party in the mansion had given you the excuse to plan an event. Family, friends, and employees, who had attended the dinner party had been hugely impressed and you had already received multiple requests to manage several events.  
Day by day, Mattie was thriving; his days were much more active and varied than they had been in your town and there were far more people around to give him attention. All the admiring attention had rather gone to Mattie’s head and he had become too demanding; a solid week of toddler tantrums had ensued whenever he was told no for anything. You were amused that Steve, had to force himself to be firm with his son when the little boy had thrown himself on the ground and rolled around and sobbed with a conviction that you were sure came from his father’s side of the family. It was a new relationship for Steve, who never had the same close relationship with his own father.  
Steve was an amazing father. He had put a lot of effort into building a good relationship with his little son. Mattie adored him and raced to greet him the minute he heard his footsteps or his voice. Steve had taken time to get to know Mattie and find out his likes and dislikes which changed every two days. As much that it hurts you to admit, seeing father and son duo together, you realized that you made the right decision in coming back to Brooklyn.  
You were happy in a way you had never thought you could be again, although sometimes you felt as if this was a beautiful dream that will come to an end with a horrific nightmare. Steve took you on a long drive to an amazing little restaurant that served very tasty food. As you were getting back into the car Steve asked abruptly,  
‘Did Rick ever bring you up here?’  
You felt your face freeze, wasn’t able to help that strong reaction to a name that was never voiced.  
‘No, he didn’t.’ you murmured stiffly.  
He did not believe you.. He hadn’t forgotten or forgiven her for the imaginary betrayal and you stared at him, you stiffened with resentment and bitterness that would destroy any reconciliation. It was a struggle to keep your emotions in check.  
‘I shouldn’t have asked,’ Steve conceded.  
‘I’m surprised you did, Rick has different tastes. He prefers clubs, dancing, and party life’ you reminded him.  
‘You like dancing,’ Steve jabbed.  
‘After we were married, where did you take me? Oh, let me remind you, nowhere, you were too busy with your business’ You countered defiantly, you were out for blood, ready for a fight now.  
Steve closed his fingers around your hand to tug you closer and he kissed you hungrily.  
You caressed his cheek, your hand moved further down to his collar.  
‘You shouldn’t begin anything you can’t finish,’ you whispered.  
Steve laughed and shot you a glance, his wide sensual mouth curling with amusement.  
‘I have every intention of finishing what I began Y/N.’  
It is going to take over an hour just to get home,’ You reminded him.  
A few minutes later, Steve turned his BMW off the road and pulled up outside a hotel.  
‘Are you serious?’  
We can not have sex in the car, you maybe short but I can’t fit in the backseat’ Steve confessed, moving to open the passenger seat door and extract you.  
‘We do not have any luggage!’ you protested in self-consciousness.  
Steve didn’t give a damn unlike you, he paced over to the reception desk, his head held high, and asked for a room without any embarrassment.  
‘You are too well known for this.’ you muttered ruefully when the door closed behind you. You will be lying if you didn’t admit that you were excited by his boldness and the fact that you could still rile him up.  
Steve grinned as he reached for you again.  
‘After all the wine we had, I was concerned about our safety, and rather than risk continuing our journey I did the sensible thing and took a break,’ he mocked.  
‘Oh really, you want to take a nap?’ you teased.  
‘We are going to take a nap and you will enjoy every moment of our nap.’ Steve winked.  
Steve kissed you. He stripped off your clothes between breathless kisses and you fought with his shirt buttons and his belt, aware of the rigid cock, rubbing it through his pants. You got down on the knees and undid his pants, you took his thick cock in your mouth and started taking him deep in your mouth, chocking on his cock until tears ran through your face. Steve’s hands wrapped in your hair encouraging you to take him deep in your mouth.  
He hauled you up to him and pushed you on the bed. He forced you on all the fours and his cock bumped into your back, he grabbed your hair again and sank his big fat cock into your wet pussy slowly. He increased the speed of the strokes, pushing his fingers between your thighs, to flick your clit, it did not take you long to reach your climax, with deep, powerful strokes and Steve’s continuous attention to your clit. He continued until you hit a soul-shattering second climax and your pussy squeezed his cock until he came.  
‘You can nap now,’ You whispered generously.  
Laughing, Steve cradled you close and claimed another kiss.  
‘I have a much better idea.’  
You smiled, loving that physical closeness and relaxation and the charismatic smile tugging at the corners of his mouth as he gazed down at her. You hated the surge of emotions you felt. You hated that you could no longer imagine going back, you could not picture yourself ever leaving him again. The three-month-trial period was coming to an end.  
Although you had only been back in Brooklyn with Steve for a brief period, Steve had broken down your emotional barriers. You started looking for him whenever he wasn’t there, counting the hours till he was back. You were falling for him all over again, someone who had been programmed to hurt you…  
‘What’s up?’ Steve asked while stroking your cheek.  
‘Nothing,’ you replied, pushing him away emotionally and you began distracting him with sex.  
Steve was distracted as soon as you climbed him, which led to another session of mind-blowing sex and both of you drifted off to sleep with sweet exhaustion. You both arrived back at the mansion in the night. Gina, the housekeeper, gave you the news that a man had called twice asking for you but had not left his name for you to call back.  
‘You had no idea who could have been calling her?’ Steve asked.  
Gina nodded.  
‘If it’s important he'll call again.’ Steve concluded.  
While you talked to Gina, Rebecca came into the foyer and was speaking to her brother. Your sister-in-law’s smile was absent. You eyed Steve, he transformed from relaxed to tense.  
‘Did something happen while we were out?’ You asked Steve.  
Steve settled his pissed off gaze on you,.  
‘Rick came home for a visit. He’s staying with Mom.’ Steve replied angrily.  
After dropping that bombshell, Steve said something about having work to do and, before you could say something, he was gone and you were standing alone in the foyer…  
Rick was back! It was too much of a coincidence that Steve’s brother chose to make his first visit home in three years and so soon after your return to Brooklyn. You tossed and turned in the bed all night, unable to sleep while your thoughts ran wild. You wondered where Steve was and if he was actually working.  
Steve was not happy with the news of his brother’s arrival. You felt guilty, you remembered Steve was very fond of his younger brother and, you had played an unsuspecting part in their falling-out.


	23. Chapter 23

Rick had been a great friend. There was no competition between Rick and Steve. You and Steve were newlyweds back then, he also was a workaholic and you were lonely, bored, and unhappy, in Donna’s house, back then you were being taunted upon, questioned about every possible thing and the atmosphere had become to suffocating for your mental health, Rick seemed like a breath of fresh air and you got along well with your charming brother-in-law. You were blindsided by your friendship.

How else could Rick have sacrificed a friendship with you? How else could he have allowed Steve to go on believing that his wife had slept with his brother? Why on earth had Rick done that? How could he have been so cruel and heartless towards his own brother and his friend? You still didn’t understand and needed to know the answer to those questions. 

What you did know was that Rick had gone to London and built a new life for himself, seemingly indifferent to the chaos and unhappiness he had left behind.  
Why were you feeling guilty about Rick’s lies and Steve’s refusal to believe in your word?  
Rick was the one who had lied, by omission, and as a result, Steve was convinced that you had been unfaithful.  
Steve had rejected your denial, your words had meant nothing to him. So why did you still feel as though you did something you shouldn’t have done? Why were you bearing the blame when you were the victim of Rick’s lies and your husband’s distrust?  
You scrambled out of the bed, and head downstairs in search of Steve. Feeling sorry for yourself is not going to you anything, you saw Steve’s coldness earlier just saying his brother’s name, you knew that forgiveness wasn’t even on the cards. 

Steve wasn’t in his study. He was on the terrace. His back was towards you as if he sensed your presence, he said ‘I thought you would be asleep by now,’.  
‘I am not that uncaring, and I certainly don’t like guilted for something I never did.’  
‘You really don’t want to go down that road.’  
‘Rick did quite a number on you . You chose to believe your brother rather than your wife so you gave him the power to torment you’ you said sharply.  
Steve turned around suddenly.  
‘No one is tormenting me,’ he declared  
‘Alright, I’m being tortured by this!’ You claimed. You took a step towards him.  
‘It’s like a big crater is opening up between us again.’  
‘And you’re surprised ?’ Steve asked sardonically.  
You were filled with embarrassment in a second. You felt angry, bitter, offended, and dreadful.  
You were on the edge, you resisted the urge to move closer to him, for the first time since your return to Brooklyn you were afraid of rejection.  
‘Don’t do this to us’ you pleaded.  
His attention remained on you.  
‘Go back to bed before I say things that we won’t be able to forget,’ Steve replied curtly.  
You knew not talking can make things worse, you wanted him to open up.  
‘I’m not running away and I want to be with you.’  
‘I don’t want to be with you right now,’ Steve said stonily.  
His admission hit you like a brick and you were left speechless.  
‘Because you won’t let yourself want me,’ she challenged.  
‘You can be so naïve sometimes. If I could put it all behind me and no longer think about it, I would have done that by now.’ Steve replied.  
Happy images gathered from recent weeks were flooding your thoughts. Everything you valued, not just happiness, was at risk and it was terrifying. You hated Rick and wished you had never befriended him.  
‘Let’s go to bed,’ you whispered.  
‘I’m not in the mood,’ Steve said with annoyance.  
He was too controlled to shout at you. He won't tell you what he was thinking, but then he didn’t really need to.  
‘Why did you ask me to give our marriage another chance if you were planning to behave like this?’ you accused him.  
‘I never agreed to turn a new page on our relationship and I’ve behaved rationally all things considered.’  
‘That is a load of bullshit’ you said angrily.  
‘You screwed up our relationship then and you are screwing up our relationship again.’ You added.  
‘I screwed it up?’ he replied humorously.  
‘When you will be finally forced to accept that I never had an affair with your brother, who are you going to blame then? At this rate, we won’t last long. You might not be forgiving, Steve, but neither am I and I’m beginning to think that I’ve wasted enough of my life on a dead relationship’ you replied.  
‘It’s not dead’  
‘It feels dead to me. I shouldn’t be my wasting time on you. I should be getting a divorce and looking for a man who really wants me…not some guy tearing us both apart over an affair that never happened!’You pronounced.  
‘I don’t want a divorce’ Steve replied in disagreement.  
‘You can’t live with me but also don’t want to live without me… But then again I can live without you. I had a life without you a good life...’  
‘I don’t think it was that good since you decided to walk away from it to come back to a life of extravagance with me!’ He said with a sarcastic smile.


	24. Chapter 24

‘I only came back here to try again for Mattie’s sake. I’m not a gold-digger!’ you bit back.  
You wanted him to retort with one final jab.  
‘I never wanted you for your money, I was in a bit of a mess and used more money than I should when we were first married, but it wasn’t greed I can tell you that.’ you told him heatedly.  
‘I believe that,’ he said, surprising her with that declaration of faith.  
‘I am sorry about the money, I was stupid,’ You admitted,.  
You were stupid; you had thrown away thousands and thousands of dollars and yet you could not tell what you had done with it.  
Steve took a jerky step forward.  
‘It was a bad time for business. My resources were worn thin due to the economic recession and struggle to keep the jobs of my employees. I was struggling to hold on to what I had. It was the worst possible time for you to spend the money…but then again I shouldn’t have left you access to so much of it.’  
‘Are you saying that you had financial troubles while we were together? Why didn’t you tell me?’ you gasped in disbelief.  
‘I didn’t want to burden you…’  
Your eyes prickled with tears.  
‘I knew you did not have a clue that there was anything to worry about,’  
‘But the truth is that my father left so most of the money to Mom until recently it was a struggle for me just to keep the business afloat.’  
You could not hide how shocked you were by Steve’s confession.  
‘I had no idea. You should have told me, Steve. In fact, not only did you not tell me there was a problem, you used to an awful lot of expensive gifts for me, Why the heck did you do that? ’ you reminded him.  
‘You wanted the whole fairy tale and I wanted you to have it. How could I tell you that I was in danger of losing it all ?’ Steve admitted  
‘All the hours you were working, turning night into day…you were never at home, you were trying to keep your businesses afloat?’ you muttered unable to control your tears.  
‘Yeah, and it paid off. I secured new contracts for the company and the economy changed but it was too late. I had lost my wife,’ Steve chanted dismally.  
You wanted to hug him, and wanted to slap some sense into him for keeping secrets from you. He had treated you like a doll who couldn’t handle the grown-up stuff when, in reality, you had never been that naïve even as a child. You were appalled, Steve struggled and worked long thankless hours while you went out to go clubbing with Rick and on a shopping spree.  
‘Steve…if you had told me, shared the bad stuff with me instead of leaving me in the dark, things would have been so much different, I would’ve understood. I would have made changes.’  
‘I’m not so sure... You were very young, naïve, pregnant and unhappy…I didn’t want to stress you out.’ Steve replied.  
He was wrong. He was an old-fashioned guy and he had always seen it as solely his role to provide for you. He had loved to spoil you with gifts when all you ever wanted was his precious time and attention.  
‘I never expected you to be my superhero, If you told me, I would have never spent so much time with your brother. I felt neglected, that you regretted marrying me and you were bored and that that’s why you never came home.’ you told him  
‘It never occurred to me that telling you that I was on the brink of losing everything, including our home, might save my marriage,’ Steve confided cynically.  
‘It just goes to show how little you know me. I’m very dependable and I would have been by your side through thick and thin!’  
You claimed proudly.  
‘I think you had much more in common with my fun-loving brother,’ Steve murmured with a decisive edge.  
‘I wasn’t that shallow. But you never gave me a chance to prove otherwise.’ You replied.  
You walked back to bed without another word. Your cellphone phone dinged, you checked the notifications. You had a missed call and two text messages. One was from Rebecca, saying that she hoped that you didn’t mind her giving Rick your phone number. The second text and the missed call were from Rick and you were shocked that he dared to call and message you.  
‘I want to talk to you ASAP’  
You deleted the text. The last thing your marriage needed was more fuel for the same fire.  
The door opened, startling you. You froze when you saw Steve and then you slid out of bed and sped over to him, wrapping her arms around his neck and letting your head fall back as he grabbed you kissed you senseless.  
‘I didn’t think you would come,’ you confided,  
‘Living apart won’t help us. Been there, done that, we lived apart while you were pregnant with Mattie and it made everything worse.’ Steve reminded you.  
‘That was your choice, not mine,’ you said cheekily.  
It wasn’t a choice, it was a necessity.’  
‘How was it a necessity?’ you questioned.  
‘Right from the start, Dr. Banner was afraid you would miscarry. He was quite frank with me. It was obvious that the baby was going to be big. I felt guilty of putting you and your health at risk,’ Steve admitted, his arm tightening around you to pull you closer.  
‘I didn't think I was at risk’ you confessed.  
‘The doctor felt that you were, and I witnessed birth complications with Coulson’s wife, his baby, and wife both died on the operation table and I could never take that lightly.’  
‘Are you saying that you stopped having sex with me because Dr. Banner warned you?’  
‘Why else would I have stopped?’ Steve growled soft and low in your ear, tugging her back into the heat of his long, hard body.  
'I used another bedroom, because I was working late hours. I wanted you to properly rest without my comings and goings...’  
‘Why didn’t you tell me? I had no idea.’ You said.  
‘I was present when the doctor warned you that you would have to be very careful indeed if you wanted the pregnancy to go to term. You had already had some bleeding,’ he reminded you grimly.  
‘I know I didn’t discuss it with you but what was there to say? I didn’t have a choice. I wanted you stress free and healthy.’  
You kissed his shoulder in acknowledgement. You felt guilty. Steve did everything for you. But anxiety had such a strong grip on you that you misjudged his past behavior. You had viewed everything through the clouded eyes of unhappiness and insecurity.  
You thought Steve was bored with you but he was trying to keep you safe. He never deliberately neglected you. He was simply doing the best that he could with what he had and your behavior had only added to his problems. That realization shamed you and made you appreciate just how much you had matured since then.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your feedback is highly appreciated.


	25. Chapter 25

‘Promise me something, promise me you will stay away from Rick, will not talk to him, promise me you won’t meet him.’ Steve breathed.’  
‘I won’t…’ You replied, shocked at his request.  
‘That’s all I want’ Steve demanded.  
‘I am not against it, in fact, it's fine,’ you muttered.  
Steve let out a relieved sigh.  
‘You need to sleep, if you don’t, you would be too tired to have breakfast with me in the morning. I have to leave early for a business trip to Washington with Sam and Bucky.’ He told you.  
You loved the physical connection between Steve and you, but staying in his arms was the best feeling in the world. You would not let Rick interfere in your marriage a second time.  
You and Mattie bid a goodbye to Steve, he hated seeing his father leave… Mattie demanded to go with Steve which made Steve smile and your hear skipped a beat seeing Mattie and Steve interact. Steve promised Mattie that he’ll be home very soon. Mattie pouted nonetheless despite his father’s reassurance. Lily came to get Mattie for some playtime in the garden when Rebecca approached you.  
She looked worried.  
‘I feel bad for giving Rick your number, he said that he had something urgent to discuss with you’ she prompted.  
‘But I don’t want to talk to him…’ You admitted.  
‘If you three sat together and discussed, this problem will be resolved…rather than avoiding it, denying that it is not affecting all of you’ Rebecca suggested. 

‘Mom wants Rick to settle down, marry a girl from high society…’  
You didn’t know what to say.  
‘She is going to wait for a lifetime.’  
You assumed that Rebecca may or may not know about Rick, however, you didn’t utter a word quiet.  
Rebecca was a cautious woman, she liked to keep to herself, but she was brave. She had helped her mother move into her house. She stood up for herself when her mother tried to guilt her into staying with her brother rather than her mother. When that didn’t pan out, Donna went on the offensive, accusing Rebecca of being selfish and ungrateful towards her own mother. You wanted Rebecca to be open with you.. you didn’t want her to feel left out in any way.  
You had been lately missing Maria too, hoping that she would visit you here in Brooklyn.  
You spent time redecorating the house with the help of Gina, playing with Mattie, and roaming around in the Mansion with Rebecca. You hated this place because it looked too clinical for your taste, no coziness, no homely feeling. You wondered if you should have discussed the changes with Steve first, but then you remembered he told you he had no idea about what you were talking about… So you followed your gut. Gina said something about someone visiting, you didn’t realize it was Rick..  
‘What are you doing here?’ you asked.  
You were shocked… He dared to come to your house when you blocked his number and refused to text him back..Rick looked younger version of his big brother, though he was not as bulky as Steve.  
‘I don’t want to see you.’ You stated.  
‘That hurts, we are family…’ Rick said in reproach.  
‘I can’t believe you had the audacity to show your face to me, after what you did to me and my marriage’ you said with much pent-up anger.  
Rick frowned.  
‘Why you are so angry with me?’ He played dumb.  
‘Why in the hell did you let Steve believe that we had had an affair?’ you asked.  
‘You had left him. Your marriage was over. What difference did it make?’ he questioned.  
‘But it should have mattered to you..Steve is your brother, he was tortured by the imaginary affair you let him believe we had..?’ You slung back at him furiously.  
Rick breathed in deep.  
‘I didn’t really care what anyone thought I needed a reason to move away from home. Marcus and I wanted to be ourselves, to enjoy being a couple away from here where everybody expects me to marry some girl. And I honestly believed that you and Steve were done, I didn’t think it would matter.’  
‘You’re not that dumb, you could have moved away without hurting Steve with your lies.’ You countered  
‘I never did actually told a lie, I didn’t have to. Steve was convinced that you and I had an affair and I didn’t deny it. I didn’t care that he wanted to believe something so ridiculous, that was on him. It had nothing to do with me’ he patronized you.  
‘It had everything to do with you! You didn’t care who got hurt. You used our fictional affair as an excuse’ You yelled back at him.  
‘Your marriage was over, I didn’t know you were still pregnant back then’ Rick reminded you.  
‘I didn’t know that either’ You conceded unwillingly.  
‘If I had known, I would have corrected his suspicions,’ Rick argued.  
Now you know and we’re trying to make it work again, but he still believes that I slept with you’ You pointed out.  
‘Steve had everything… in business, with women, he never had to work for anything, so I guess a little pain was fair’ Rick said with resentment. You hated this vile man, hated him with all your being, Steve had loved Rick, given him everything, and just because things don’t go Rick’s way he blames Steve for that, lets Steve believe that you had affair with him…  
‘You have to tell Steve the truth.’  
‘No can do.’  
‘If that’s the case, I will tell him’ you challenged.  
‘You promised.’  
‘I am hurting Steve and my marriage by keeping your secret. I can’t do it anymore, you have to tell your family, they love you, I am sure they will accept it.’ you said forcefully  
‘You know how conservative she is, she is old-fashioned, she is not going to accept me’ Rick declared.  
You nodded in confirmation.  
‘She is narrow-minded in that aspect but it could change if you talked to her and gave her the chance.’  
‘You’ve got to be joking, She will cut off my allowance’ Rick snapped.  
‘Why do you need an allowance from your mother? Don’t you have a job?.’  
Rick groaned.  
‘Do you really think that I can afford a lavish lifestyle on an my salary?’ He taunted.  
‘ I don’t care whether you live on allowance from your mother, I care about Steve, atleast tell him that you are gay.’ You negotiated.  
‘I am certainly not telling Steve. He fired a gay guy from his company.’  
‘That had nothing to do with Alex’s sexual orientation, he was embezzling money, he was treated the same way his partner in crime was treated, he fired Alex and William. Steve is not homophobic. He does not share Donna’s old-fashioned beliefs, Steve is his own person,’ You reasoned.  
‘I am not asking you, Rick, I’m telling you that if you don’t tell your brother, I will do it for you. I don’t have to keep your secret when it’s threatening my family’s happiness’  
‘You’re blackmailing me,’ Rick accused her angrily.  
‘I am not blackmailing you, moreover, I don’t care about you, I don’t owe you anything after what you have done to my husband,’ You contended,  
Registering that you were deadly serious and not backing down, Rick lost his temper cursing left and right. He left angrily when he did not get a reaction from you.


	26. Chapter 26

As soon as he left you couldn’t help but think about your friendship with Rick. You had seen a different side of Rick today. Rick was financially dependent on Donna for his lifestyle. It was quite possible Donna would cut-off ties with Rick.   
You had once been incredibly naïve and trusting when it came to Rick.   
Your friendship with Rick had made you keep secrets from Steve Rick had used you as a scapegoat. His boyfriend, Marcus, was always present during the night outs with Rick.  
You hated that from the beginning you had kept secrets from. You did not want to dig up the past.  
You wanted to tell Steve about the money you had taken from your joint account, but you were worried that he would start seeing you in a different light.  
‘Rick can be unpredictable,’ his sister, Rebecca, remarked.   
‘Yeah..’’ You agreed.   
Your phone rang, you saw Steve’s name flashing on the screen. Apparently, Steve had to stay in Washington. You wanted to be with him, he was your home.  
‘You should go to Washington, I know you want to, I will take care of Mattie ’ Rebecca suggested.  
You liked the idea, and you trusted Rebecca enough to leave Mattie in her care.  
You felt giddy at the idea of surprising Steve, you had never done that..  
You were in your bedroom packing when the cordless phone rang.  
‘Hey kiddo!’ a rough-edged male voice demanded.   
You froze, your heart sank. You never wanted to hear that voice ever again.   
You recalled, a phone call from an unnamed man, Gina had told you..  
‘How did you find me?’ you asked.  
I saw your picture in a magazine. My little girl at a gala, you went back to your rich husband and didn’t even tell me’ the older man jeered.  
‘Why should I?’ You asked your father.   
‘The magazine mentioned that you were a mother now, I want to see my grandchild, Maybe I should visit you… But if I come now, it would look bad.. don't you think?’ your father complained.   
‘I don’t have any money…I’m not giving you anything, leave me alone!’ You cut the call   
You will not be bullied into giving him money this time around. You will not respond to his threats.

Your father was an evil, terrifying man, who had mentally abused and physically assaulted both his wife and his daughter. He had thrown you out of the house as soon as you turned eighteen. He had no right to demand money, no right to terrorize you. He will call again, if he does not get the money, he will visit you, he had done that once before. You had paid him to keep his distance and mouth shut two years ago. He had extorted you just because you told a lie to Steve because you felt conscious. After all, Steve had a respectable background, and you didn’t want him to know that your father had often dealt with the law, generally because he was imprisoned due to possession of drugs while he was using them too, and running a gambling ring.

You winced at the thought of telling Steve that your father had been imprisoned frequently and that he also used to beat her mother. You lived a sad and cruel life as a child with an alcoholic mother who hated her life. 

You reached Steve’s headquarters. When you arrived inside the building, you learned that he was in a meeting and perhaps it had been a bad idea to surprise him when he was clearly so busy. You were just getting comfortable in Reception when two of Steve’s executives passed by and, recognizing you, they stopped to exchange pleasantries.   
After renegotiation in the conference room, Steve escorted his clients and their lawyers off the premises before he saw his wife surrounded by his employees in Reception. Your shrug only covered your arms, and left your curvy body on display. He felt jealousy creep upon him when he saw you laugh at some guy’s joke.  
Your gaze fell on Steve and you got up from your seat with a sunny smile to greet him.   
‘Are you busy?’ you asked.   
‘I doubt any man or woman in this building would be too busy for you.. You look beautiful’ he murmured with a smile.   
You noticed that his smile didn’t reach his eyes. Steve’s smile was a façade.  
‘Are you done for the day?’ you asked anxiously.   
‘Yes.’ Steve replied while guiding you to lift and then took you to the parking area.  
‘What brought you to Washington?’ Steve inquired, his driver pulled up.  
‘I wanted to see you.’ You told honestly.  
‘Do want to tell me something?’ Steve enquired.   
You felt the tension between you and Steve   
‘What would I have to tell you?’  
‘You can answer that question,’ Steve breathed icily.   
‘Just tell me what’s wrong. Are you angry because I surprised you at your office?’ you asked trying to hide your tears of humiliation due to his cold reaction.  
‘What did you expect?’ Steve replied.   
Steve’s anger was seeping out. His driver opened the car door and they climbed out when you reached the apartment.   
‘Why are you angry with me Steve?’ you prompted.  
‘You are a liar, I can’t trust you for a moment… I don’t think I can stay married to you’ Steve declared.


	27. Chapter 27

That statement was a pinch to your solar plexus, you could not fathom why he would say such a thing..There was only one possible explanation for his behavior.   
‘You know that Rick came to the mansion, don’t you? How?’ You asked.   
‘I called your cell and then when you didn’t answer I called the mansion’s line to talk to you, Gina told me that you were with him.’  
The silence dragged horribly.   
‘Rick came to the mansion to talk to me because he texted and called last night and I blocked his number on my phone without a response.’ You told him   
‘You didn’t tell me that too.’  
‘I didn’t want a stupid text message and a missed call from Rick to cause more trouble between us.’ You pleaded.  
‘I can’t trust you Y/N, and I don’t think I can live with you, I thought we were making progress, and then I learn that you were with Rick, despite your promise.’

You were trembling, you had never felt as alone or scared since childhood as you did at that moment.   
You knew he had made up his mind… You had nothing left, you could not argue with him.You could not think straight. You lost him again..   
You had seriously underestimated the damage being done by Steve’s conviction that you had been unfaithful. Your talk with Rick had solidified that you were not to be trusted. But you had nothing to lose anymore..

‘There has never been anything between your brother and me and he will tell you about that by the end of the week,’ You told him  
Steve in a feverish rush, too worked up to stop and plan what she had to say before she spoke.   
Steve was frowning at her.   
‘What are you talking about?’  
‘Rick told me that he never actually told you that we had had an affair, he just didn’t deny your accusation. You’ll know the truth soon enough because either he or I will tell you why there was never any chance of an affair…’  
‘Stop making everything so complicated’ Steve exclaimed in frustration at that tangled explanation.   
‘I promised Rick that I would let him talk to you before I did.’ You admitted.  
Outrage flared in Steve’s brooding scrutiny.   
‘Tell me now’ he shouted at you.  
‘Rick is gay.’ You whispered   
‘Are you trying to come up with a good cover story now?’ Steve asked.  
‘I appreciate that what I’ve just told you may come as a shock to you, but I’m not lying or trying to come up with a story,’ You protested fiercely.   
‘My brother has dated only women…since he was sixteen as far as I am aware. I think I would know if he was gay,’ Steve proclaimed with denial.   
‘That is because Rick has done everything possible to hide it from your mother and her sanctimonious bullshit. The so-called girlfriends were just part of the pretense he put up. Didn’t you ever wonder why he changed girlfriends every couple of weeks?’  
‘Not many guys want a serious relationship.’ Steve retorted.  
‘I’m not going to get anywhere with you, am I? You just don’t believe me. Rick didn’t want anyone to know, particularly not your mother. I know Donna’s outright homophobic and Rick was afraid she would cut off the allowance she gives him.’ You explained.  
‘Well, I for one don’t believe your lies’ Steve condemned.  
‘From what I know Rick is still with Marcus,’ you remarked.   
‘What does that have to do with anything? They are friends like Sam, Bucky and I are. They’re old friends.’  
‘They are partners Steve, They’re together. Didn’t you find that Marcus going with Rick to London is quite strange, even if they are old friends?

Steve wanted to argue but then suddenly he frowned and slowly closed his mouth again.   
Something cleared in Steve’s mind. You studied Steve fixedly, recognizing that he was still fighting his shock.

‘So he has been leading a double life for years, Why didn’t he just tell me? I don’t care if he is straight or gay, he is my brother. But why in the hell did Rick let me believe that you and he had had an affair?’ Steve talked out loud.   
‘He’s jealous of you, and of everything you’ve achieved in life,’ you disclosed.   
‘I know he is very competitive,’ Steve acknowledged.   
‘I don’t know how he could let you go on believing something that never happened, but that’s something you need to discuss with him.’ You replied.  
‘I need a scotch,’ Steve admitted She closed a damp palm round the moisture-beaded tumbler he handed to her and pressed the glass against the overheated skin below her  
‘Are you ok?’ you whispered worriedly.   
‘No, I am trying to process everything, Mom is going to throw a fit’ he admitted flatly.   
I think right at this moment, it is more important to concentrate on what I’ve done to you and our marriage. I convicted you, misjudged you, denied your words.’  
‘It's ok, it is good that you finally know the truth. Rick didn’t deny the affair you found it hard to believe anything else.’ You said with relief.  
‘He used you to get back to me. I should have trusted you.’ He said defeatedly.  
‘Let’s go out to eat.’ He added silently, hiding his remorse and sadness.


	28. Chapter 28

You wanted to hug Steve and tell him that you loved him enough to forgive him. Steve was very a proud man. He had high moral standards and, sadly for him, he had just failed to live up to his own standards. He had to deal with it in his own way.  
Both of you dined only a few streets away in a local restaurant. You reached for his hand seeing him lost in his thoughts and he gripped your hand tightly.  
‘Please, don’t say anything sweet or understanding, I would rather have your anger more than your pity, I want you to shout at me for being strong-headed and arrogant’ he urged seconds away from an emotion breakdown. So you decided to change the topic...you knew he Steve had been shaken to core..  
‘What happened to the old apartment in Washington, I thought you stayed at our old apartment... thank god I didn’t go to the apartment’ you said in relief.  
‘After you left, that place became really depressing for me, I hated it without you, so I sold it, anything that you left was shipped to Brooklyn’ he confessed.  
‘Did you stay in our bedroom at the mansion before I came back?’ you wondered.  
‘I did not....could not, it was not the same without you, your memories used to haunt me, I could not even bring myself to get rid of any of your stuff.’ He shrugged his broad shoulder in dismissal.  
He was very sensitive and it was a discovery that bothered you, Steve must have been wrecked when he was tricked into believing that you had an affair with his brother. He did not need to love you to be hurt. Rick had definitely struck Steve where it hurt most, you, you were his weak spot. 

Back at the apartment 

You laid awake that night alone because Steve wanted to finish up everything before flying back home in the morning as soon as possible. You knew it was an excuse, he just wanted to be alone and you did not want to force him. It was your pride talking, your bane, you loved a man who did not love you back .  
You dozed off, you woke up alone, you checked your phone it was around three seventeen in the morning.  
Steve was drunk, you knew that because you saw empty bottles in the living room. Steve was in his blue PJs and his t-shirt. As soon as he saw you he staggered upright to reach to you and he swayed and almost lost his footing. He steadied himself against the table very clumsily.

‘Steve?’ you called out his name.  
‘I don’t want to talk to you right now’ Steve slurred.  
‘You’re going to talk to me whether you want to or not. Anything is better than you sitting drinking alone! For once in our life we are going to be the couple that talks’ You replied taking the bottle out of his reach.  
‘You’ve been drinking and I want to know why,’ You spelled out.  
‘Not now Y/N…’  
‘I need to understand why,’ you rephrased gently.  
‘Isn’t that obvious? I got everything in our marriage wrong! Every-fucking-thing!’ he shouted in remorse mixed with self-hatred.  
‘Shit happens. You just have to live with it.’ You concluded.  
‘No sympathy, sweetheart?’ Steve quirked his eyebrow.  
‘You put me through hell. You don’t deserve it,’ you told him bluntly.  
‘Do you know how much power you have over me? You always did, when I saw you with another man it made me feel angry, jealous, and miserable and I can never forget the way it made me feel’ he confided.  
‘When?’ you interrupted.  
‘That time you decided that if I was dating other women you would not date me but wanted to be friends and you started seeing other men,’ he specified.  
‘Yeah, obviously, I did not want to be in the roster of women you were sleeping with, but I still wanted you in my life and being your friend seemed the only way’ you commented.  
‘I came to see you, but you were not at your place, so I decided to wait outside your apartment building, I guess you were coming back from your date that's when I saw you. You were walking on the sidewalk with him, you both were holding hands, he must have said something funny, you laughed wholeheartedly and gave him your signature sunny smile. It was the same way you smiled at me, I hated it, hated that feeling, feeling of not being that guy. I would have done anything to keep him out of your life! And I hated myself for it... I was jealous of that man and up until that point I had never been jealous, Sharon dated men alongside me but I had been never jealous of anyone of those men... but I absolutely hated when I found you with that guy.’ Steve recalled.  
'You wanted honesty, I'll give it to you. I hated you that spent so much time with my brother. I wanted to be reasonable about it. I knew I was working round the clock. I knew you were bored and unhappy, but you and Rick, you both got along, you two seemed close. Of course, it bothered me I thought I was losing you. And I began to believe that you were having an affair with my brother.’ Steve continued.  
‘Really? I was pregnant with Mattie and was sick constantly?’ You asked him rhetorically.  
‘Rick was always seeking you out, calling you, sharing secrets and all those internal jokes…’ Steve muttered with a pang of sadness.  
‘He told me that he was gay and it made me feel privileged, I was someone he trusted enough to come out to, I didn’t realize that you were jealous.’ you muttered.  
‘I was too proud to tell you that, but the jealousy tinted my vision and twisted everything I saw’ he revealed  
‘I thought you were mocking me by preferring Rick’ Steve added  
‘I wanted your attention... good god I sound like a teenager. I didn’t know that you were working hard to keep your businesses afloat. I thought you were bored with me’ You confessed in embarrassment  
‘I felt many things but boredom was never one of it,’ Steve revealed with a look of sardonic amusement.  
You saw the man and his flaws. He wasn’t perfect but it didn’t matter because neither were you. But all that truly mattered to you just then was that he had never stopped wanting you before or after your marriage.


	29. Chapter 29

‘Why were you drinking Steve?’ you asked him worriedly.  
‘I have let you down...I let you down in every way that mattered. You were my wife and instead of supporting you and caring for you, I accused you of cheating on me with my brother. Then I drove you away.’  
‘But now you know the truth.’ you replied  
‘And I have to live with the bitter truth that I have hurt you so much, I didn’t believe you because I was seeing everything through the shade of jealousy…’Steve replied regretting everything. ‘I need a shower’ He dismissed his feelings again and left you alone in the room. You went back to the bedroom but he never came to the bedroom.

The next morning, however, it was business as usual for Steve. Not a hint of last night’s confessions, he even made light chit chat during breakfast. He’d made arrangements for the car you had driven to Washington to be returned to the mansion and you both left for the flight home. Mattie came running out into the garden to excitedly greet his parents and Steve snatched his son off his feet, peppered him with kissed and hugged him close to his heart, you saw the unbreakable bond that had been formed between father and son, it tugged your heartstrings. 

It was the very next day that you received her second call from your father. You were with Steve when the call came and you left the room to take it. 

‘It’s normal for a man to expect his daughter to help him out, life ain’t cheap outside of prison’ your father told you in a self-pitying whine.  
‘Have you tried to find any work?’ You inquired flatly.  
‘It’s not that easy.’ He replied.  
‘Really…?’ You said sarcastically. ‘You’ve never worked a day in your life and I’m not giving you any more money.’ You added honestly.  
‘You’re married to a very rich man. I’ve done my homework. You can give me retirement money without making a dent in your husband’s savings’ he added greedily.  
‘I am not going to be blackmailed by you. I’m not giving you a single penny of my husband’s hard-earned cash. Moreover, it’s not mine to give,’ You asserted with cold clarity. 

You felt ashamed, you had given in to his blackmails and given him huge sums of money recklessly you now knew Steve had needed at that time, just to keep the older man silent. Now that you called his bluff you were scared that he might try to sell his story to paparazzi. 

‘Who was that on the phone?’ Steve asked  
‘Oh, just someone from home. Nobody important....’ You replied trying to be calm.

If Steve noticed something he did not say anything and went back to the task of teaching Mattie to swim. That kid was very much a water baby, your son paddled over to you and giggled as he splashed you.

Your marriage had a future again. You were not about to let go of that without a fight. 

Steve went out of his way to spend time with you and Mattie but, even though he returned to the bedroom, he didn’t touch you. You went out for dinners several times but nothing happened except him buying you expensive as hell gifts again and again. 

‘What is this for?’ she asked  
‘You’re my wife. I want to give you gifts.’  
‘As long as it’s not your guilty conscience talking, You don’t need to buy my love, Steve. You know I love you.’ you cut in uncomfortably.  
‘Do I? I don’t want to take you for granted. And I like giving gifts to you, you are my wife. I always did...’ he said softly cupping your cheeks and kissing you lips softly.  
‘I had a difficult childhood and your gifts no matter what they are make me happy, the seashells that you gifted me from the beach where we took our first stroll as husband and wife, anything you ever got me, it makes me feel special...’ you confessed shyly. Steve's heart grew five times when he heard that you loved his gifts.  
‘You never talk about your childhood.’ he pointed out.  
‘There’s not much to talk about. We were always short of money and my parents were not happily married.’ you told him, trying to avoid a difficult conversation.  
‘You told me that your mother died in a car crash.’ Steve replied.  
‘Yes. It was a difficult and sad time for me,’ you said quickly, trying to change the subject as soon as possible.

Your father had called twice, one call came when you were out and in the second call he threatened to come and visit her in Brooklyn. The last time your father had insisted on being paid in untraceable cash, and although you had sworn you would not pay blackmail money again, you knew to the last penny how much money you had in your bank account, and also had a very good idea of how much of time it would buy till his next call.

‘I’ve decided to meet Rick this weekend, I want to give him a chance to tell me’ Steve told you.  
‘Give him some more time,’ You suggested.  
‘I can’t…This dispute has gone on long enough. Oh, by the way, Rebecca knows, I told her’ Steve countered,  
‘Oh..ok...I guess Rick is your brother, you both had a right to know,’ You confided.  
‘She said that it explained why Marcus moved to London with him, ' he added. 'Why are you so jumpy? Is it because I want to confront Rick?’ Steve remarked wryly.  
‘Jumpy? Nope’ You tried to be cool.  
‘You have been tensed lately, trust me I have no plans to create a scene with my brother. It’s a little late for that. I’ll keep my temper under control, but I don’t think I could ever forgive him.’ Steve admitted. 

‘Let it go... just like Elsa.’ you joked. Steve smiled, his dumb smile, that made your heart skip a beat.... Everything was falling into place.


	30. Chapter 30

On the surface, things were now fine in their marriage. So, Steve had never said that he loved her and he probably never would, you reflected ruefully. Well, that was life. You couldn’t have everything and what you did get was rarely perfect. He was making a real effort to make you happy and he was a terrific father. It didn’t get much better than that, you bargained with yourself, you had everything else in the world, you should not let one thing bother you this much. You had always loved him, had learned to get by without him when their marriage failed, but now that you were older and wiser and you knew that no other man could make you happy as Steve did without even trying very hard. 

Even though Steve disliked nightclubs because he was an old man at the heart, he took you out in Manhattan and you stayed over in the apartment there, had a picnic down by the mansion lake in the shelter of the trees with Mattie and you paddled at the water’s edge with your son giggling in your arms. In the evening, you both dined out on the terrace. 

You were asked if you would plan his cousin’s wedding and Rick let everyone in the family know that he was gay and Marcus was his partner and that he and his partner were heading back to London that weekend. Donna was shocked but Rick, on the other hand, informed you that his mother had she was certainly annoyed with him but was still giving him his allowance. He also confessed that he was surprised by his older brother’s acceptance of his sexuality.

The next morning, you were making the plans for the family wedding when Gina told you had a visitor.   
You were horrified to see your father walking into the huge foyer. 

‘Wow kiddo you never told me you were living in a palace! You can certainly help me out from the looks of it ’ he derived,   
You were grateful that Steve was out having a look at the construction he ordered on the side of the lake and unlikely to return before evening.   
‘What are you doing here? I told you to leave me alone.’ you replied.  
‘You don’t talk to me that way, Y/N! I brought you into this world and raised you and I expect you to treat me with respect.’ he retorted furiously, his voice rising like it did when you were little and he would expect you to cook and clean for him, when you made a mistake his voice would raise an octave before his hands. 

You were very scared but you didn’t back off, even though he was too close and too loud for comfort. ‘After the way you treated me and my mother, I don’t owe you anything, you threw me out when I turned eighteen with nothing but clothes on my back, I have a good life here and I’m not about to let you ruin it for me.’ you argued with a fit of anger you couldn’t hide.. 

‘I am sure your husband would like to know where you come from, don’t you?’ your father sneered,   
Your father saw the teardrop diamond necklace Steve gave you hanging on your neck and grabbed it, trying to snatch it away from your neck.  
‘It must be worth a fortune, if you can’t give me cash like the last time, I want you to give me the necklace’ he added. The chain broke bruising the back of your neck. But you could not let him have it.

‘No! You can’t have it. Give it back to me!’ you tried to take away your necklace from him.  
‘You can let me take it or I can come back one night with a few buddies of mine from jail’ your father threatened.  
‘If anything and I mean anything happens here, I will tell Steve about you.’ You threatened.  
‘You won’t! You'll do anything to keep him in the dark..’ your father rebuked.  
‘Give me back that necklace before I call the police’ you threatened again.  
‘You are not going to call the police!’ he bit out with smug assurance. 

You tried to take the necklace from him. He punched you in the stomach and you fell on the ground but got hit in the head by the coffee table. You felt a hand behind your head, what you did not know your father grabbed your head and hit it against the coffee table again.


	31. Chapter 31

You felt disoriented and dumbfounded. The door burst open and you saw Steve come inside with his jaw clenched and face red from anger. An instant later, Steve was lifting you off the floor, settling you down with care on the couch, and checking you for any more injuries. 

‘He’s my father… he has my necklace in his pocket and he hit me when I tried to get it back from him’ you whispered dizzily.  
Steve did not need any prompting, he punched the lights out of the older man, somebody had laid their hands on you, his wife. Steve’s rage was uncontrollable, his heart sank when he saw you… Steve checked the older man’s pockets for your necklace, he knew you loved that damn necklace because that was a wedding gift from him. Once he found what he was looking for, he called the police, to deal with the scum of the earth, the man who dared hurt his wife, the man responsible for spilling the blood of his Y/N. He tied him to the chair, when the police came, Gina and Steve gave statements, police officers tried to question you but Steve did not want to stress you out. 

‘How did you know what was happening here?’ You demanded shakily when the police left with your father. 

‘He forced his way inside and Gina saw the way you reacted when you saw him so she called me immediately.’

‘You hate me, don’t you? I never told you about him because I didn’t want you to ever know him and I pretended he was dead rather than tell you all about him. I was scared that you would be embarrassed.’ you confessed.

‘I would never hate you but I can understand why you didn’t want to tell me about him. …. I am very proud of you sweetheart…you overcame that toxic and violent environment all by yourself… You made something of yourself not once but twice…’ Steve admitted proudly.

‘He is a convicted violent criminal,’ You confided. You sobbed out your whole childhood to Steve. About your father’s violence and long stays in prison, your mother’s alcoholism, and the toxic atmosphere in your childhood home. 

‘You had found a decent job for yourself and were fully independent when we first met says much more about your character than your parents. I knew you avoided some topics but it never seemed important enough for me to dig into your past. I wanted you whoever you were and regardless of where you came from, whatever your past was…’ Steve told you with quiet confidence.

‘Honestly? Walking away was never an option for me. I met you and that was that it was a done deal. Do you remember the weekends we spent together at the house I rented near the office where you worked? Those weekends were some of the happiest of my life and I could never have let you go after that’ Steve admitted, dark eyes intent on your troubled face as you nodded uncertainly..

‘Then why did you cancel our dates?’ you asked him.

Steve groaned. ‘I was fighting what I felt for you. I wanted to call you so many times, just to hear your voice. I believed that wasn’t ready to settle down. I definitely did not want to fall in love. I had seen what it had done to Rebecca, I was scared.'

‘I thought the stark contrast between us bothered you.’ You added.

‘They did bother me at first, but then they didn’t seem to bother me at all. After that month when we were broken up, I knew I needed you for peace of mind, you spoke your mind, didn’t let me buy stuff, you hated having dates at fancy restaurants, you liked simple home-cooked meals, you even taught me how to cook, clean and do the laundry, trust me no woman had ever made me do those things ’ Steve admitted.

‘I thought that for you it was just sex.’ You admitted.

‘Just sex would have been easier to deal with, I didn’t know at the time that you were my soul mate, all that I ever needed, I knew that I wanted you in my life every day and not just on the weekends when I was free to meet you. Being away from you made me realize that I missed you so much that I wanted you with me all the time, Sam and Bucky used to harass me for being constantly lovesick’ Steve quipped..

‘It didn’t seem like it. You never even mentioned needing me.’ you added.

‘Of course, I didn’t. I was trying to play it cool and, I stopped seeing other women so that I could have you, and the more I saw of you, the more I wanted you to be mine. It’s all my fault, you didn’t feel that you could talk to me about your childhood.’ he pointed out 

‘I have been telling people for a long time that both my parents were dead, it was easier than telling them the truth,’ you admitted. 

‘That’s where the money went two years ago. Dad was threatening to go to the paparazzi and I was afraid it would create a scandal.’

‘Let him do whatever he wants, he has to worry about the charges against him, and you don’t have to worry about it, even if he goes to paparazzi, it will hardly make any difference’ Steve responded with immense assurance. 

‘I thought you’d be ashamed of me if you found out the truth about my parents.’ You confessed.

Steve took your hands in his hands. 

‘I just wish that you’d told me that you were being threatened, but I am hardly someone who should anything about communication’ Steve replied.  
‘God, I regret ever giving him any money, I feel so stupid’ You acknowledged. 

‘We both were stupid, I was not a good husband to you…there were so many things wrong with us at that time.’ Steve admitted with remorse.

‘He’s the other reason why I walked away from you, It wasn’t just your suspicions about my relationship with Rick, it was the fact I knew my father would continue to extort money from me. I just felt our marriage was cursed and that the best thing I could do was walk away from it, I wanted you away from the dark shadows of my past.’ You confided abruptly.

‘I would not let anyone harm you ever again, I promise to share my feeling and thoughts and things that I didn’t then share with you and that was the reason why our marriage broke down.’ Steve swore with conviction. He kissed you passionately making you week in knees.


	32. Chapter 32

‘I was starting to think that you were never going to kiss me again.’ You quipped.

‘I wanted to play safe’ Steve replied with a blush gracing his face.

You looked blank.   
‘What on earth are you talking about?’ you asked.

‘Our agreement, that we give our marriage a three-month trial, it is getting over soon’ Steve reminded. 

'Those three months were ending this week and you were acting cagey. I thought that you were on edge because you were thinking of leaving me again and were worrying about retaining custody of Mattie.’ Steve added.  
You were frowning. 

‘I totally forgot about the three-month thing!’ You replied with amazement.

‘You forgot? How could you forget an agreement like that? It’s been haunting me ever since I was stupid enough to say yes to it.’ Steve exclaimed with incredulous emphasis.

‘Oh, so that’s why you took me clubbing,’ you guessed laughingly. 

‘I got so much wrong in my relationship with you the first time, I had to make things right this time around, I was scared that you had decided to return’ Steve said with a shudder, the thought of not waking up next to you, not hearing Mattie laugh was enough to scare the Steve Rogers.

You took his face in your hands, ‘I want to be with you forever,’ you told him without hesitation. 

His hand covered yours. ‘Forever, forever?’ he questioned with a frown, you nodded.

‘All I want is you, All I have ever wanted in my life is you, I love you so much that it hurts my heart’ Steve confided, his voice breaking, his eyes filled with un-shed tears.

‘Since when did you decide to love me?’ you asked skeptically. 

‘From the first weekend we ever spent together, I didn’t want to admit it even to myself because it made me feel so powerless,’ he confided heavily. 

‘You never told me that you loved me before.’ You replied.

‘Why do you think I married you? I was devastated when you walked out on our marriage.’ Steve added.

‘Maybe it was for the best.’ You sighed.

‘I knew you I rushed you into marrying me, I didn’t even wait long enough for you to plan our wedding,’ he pointed out. 

‘I didn’t even know that was ever an option.’ you replied.

‘It wasn’t once I realized how long the arrangements would take, when Rebecca pointed out, the planning, the prepping, the venue, your dress, my tux, everything was going to take months. I was counting the days until I could bring you back to Brooklyn, to our home. That’s why I called Sam and Bucky, they pulled some strings and got us an appointment, they knew I was whipped, and I just wanted the people I loved to be present for the wedding, I hated that Rebecca missed the wedding. She chewed my ear out because she missed our wedding.’ Steve told you with emotion shining in his eyes, your husband had changed for the better.

‘Don’t ever walk out on me again.’ He added in a whisper.

‘I won’t. Did you sleep with other women after I left’ You hesitated as a long-suppressed thought occurred to you.

‘No. I told myself I would wait until I was divorced..’ Steve replied earnestly.

‘So it turns out we both were loyal despite being separated,’ You volunteered. 

‘Don’t ever leave me again. I don’t think I can survive that again’ Steve confessed.

‘I’m not going anywhere,’ you declared.

‘I should call a doctor first, get your head checked for concussion’  
Steve immediately called Dr. Helen Cho, she dressed your wound and confirmed that you were fine, and the bruising will go away in a few days. Steve took you to bedroom, not even letting you put down your feet... He bathed Mattie that night and read him a story and then came back to you, kissed you with such fervor that made you desperate for him. That night you both reacquainted and reaffirmed your vows physically. After the last few days of multiple ups and downs, you both slept in each other's embrace peacefully..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you guys want an epilogue?


	33. Epilogue

Two years later -  
You had sold your flower shop soon after Steve's confession about the three month trial period and decided to open an event management venture and partnering up with a small catering company in Brooklyn.  
Soon after the new company started running smoothly, you hired more people to help you out, Steve disclosed his wish to have another baby with you. You were scared about your second pregnancy but as luck would have it, this one was easy.

You gave birth to your daughter, Maya, a naughty little ray of sunshine, who had Steve wrapped around her fingers before she was even born. The day Steve and you found out the gender of the baby, Steve went shopping for the second time, this time he got every cute onsie for his daughter, your favorites were 'Dadddy's New Boss' and the matching green set with 'Baby Bear' onsie and 'Papa Bear' T-shirt. Steve's favorite was 'Drinking buddies' matching set, that man and his dad humor.

Maria and Rhodey came to visit as often as they could, same could be said for Sam and Bucky, but Sam did have an ulterior motive, he liked Rebecca and asked her out, thankfully Rebecca thought Sam was cute, they began dating soon after Maya’s birth. 

Steve and Rick had repaired their relationship to some extent but Steve remained cautious. Mattie started preschool, which he loved. 

You were happy with your life, both personal and professional. You told Steve just about everything and hid nothing from him and, in turn, he opened up to you and shared his fears. Steve took a backseat from his business, he started working from home, ever since you started working to look after kids.

Today you were kid free, Rebecca and Sam were baby-sitting the Mattie and Maya because they wanted a practice run before their angel came to the world and you had given Gina the day-off.

Steve had gone grocery shopping, you forced him to, that man hated shopping, be it any kind, you had to prepare for the special night for just the two of you. You prepared the dinner and the dessert (you). With kids running around the house, the sex had to be quick and quiet, but tonight you were going to have some alone time with your husband. 

You were dressed in pink lace set, over which you had Steve's black t-shirt which reached your thighs, something he loved seeing you in.  
Steve came in the house carrying the groceries leaned back against the door to shut it. He put the paper bag on the dining table, while studying you with appreciative and predatory eyes and that charismatic smile that made you wet. 'So that's why you needed chocolate syrup and whipped cream,’ he said huskily. 

'I made dinner and dessert, do you want to skip dinner and directly go to dessert?’ you asked quirking your eyebrow, moving forward to remove his jacket from his shoulders and feeling his hard body with your hands, gently massaging his chest. 

'Hell yeah. I am in mood for something sweet’ Steve took off his t-shirt and kicked off his shoes. He walked towards you, in just his jeans, you bit your lip trying to control your moan, your husband looked breathtaking, he pounced on you, carrying you bridal style towards your bedroom.  
'Don't forget the chocolate syrup and whipped cream' you reminded him.

'I love you so much,’ Steve confessed as he laid you down on the bed and ran away to get the whipped cream and chocolate syrup. When Steve came back he was in his boxer shorts.

Steve leaned forward and kissed you promisingly, a night of wild, passionate, dirty and kinky sex. it was a Friday night and you had the whole night to enjoy each other.  
'I love you Y/N,’ Steve reminded you and kissed you..  
'Oh..yeah? Show me' you broke the kiss.  
'Shush,’ he urged, kissing you again removing his t-shirt from your body and tearing up yet another set of lace underwear. The silence that ensued was broken only by little gasps, moans, sighs and grunts throughout the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How's this for the ending?


End file.
